How many black people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One, you racist.

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yo mamma's so fat, she decided to go on a diet

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What is long and hard that a bride gets on her wedding night? An erect penis.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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How many dead babies fit into a bathtub? I honestly don't know, as I have never tested this out, nor do I plan to because I would like to not handle the bodies of poor deceased infants.

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knock knock. come in.

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Why did the Mexican drive off a cliff Because he lost control of his vehicle which resulted in an unplanned trajectory causing his car to divert from the intended course and thus veer off the road onto the cliff

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How do you say "Hello" in India? 1. Get a plane ticket and fly to India 2. Say Hello in India

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why hppened when the little boy failed his math test? He cut off his penis, shaved his head and hung himself

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What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

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Why did the banana go to the hospital? It didnt, bananas cannot speak or walk. It is a simple fact so you should know.

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What do Jews always complain & want money for? Anything

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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I ponder

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What did the judge say to the midget when he sent him to jail ? Stop beating your wife

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Muffins can't speak therefor it said nothing.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your neighbour. My neighbour who? Timothy, welcome to the neighbourhood!

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There's was an old lady. She fell in a puddle

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what did batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile "robin, get in the batmobile"

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roses are red violets are blue ur mom just died and u will 2

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What happened when a man drove up to an escort and said "want to check my bags?" The escort replied "Certainly, sir" due to the fact the escort worked at a hotel.

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A man walks into a bar and walks up to the counter. The bartender looks the man up and down and asks "Can I help you?" "Ya, get this guy off my ass" the duck promptly replies.

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What happened to the village that got swept by a tsunami? It was destroyed.

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what do you say when you see a winner weaner

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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