How long did it take azaha to have a shit? Nine months

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What did the priest say to Jesus when he revealed himself on Christmas morning? Happy birthday

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so dont touch it.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. It was a dead monkey.

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Q: What do you do when your friend tells you he murdered someone? A: Call the police.

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Q: what did a kid in harlem get for christmas? A: nothing he got shot

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have you tasted chocolate flavoured slurpee? no. i haven't either

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what did batman say to robin before he got in the batmobile get in the batmobile

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Whats worse than finding out that your family is dead? finding a worm in your apple

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why do all good things come to an end? that is one of the mysteries of human existance.

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Q:how man ADD kids does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: I dont know, wanna go ride bikes?

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Dylan Hodge fingered himself. Hah.

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Why was the boy sitting alone? Because all his friends died.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? I don't know it depends on how hard you throw them.

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A midget walks into a bar. No one cares.

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How did the blind man watch T.V? With the captions on.

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knock knock, whos there? your neighbor's cat..no not really, but your sister just got raped

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was a metaphor.

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What do you call 200 black people dead in the ocean? It's a start.

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What do you call a cow climbing a tree? Amazing. How many cows have you seen climbing trees?

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a bald man walks into a hairdressers and demands beans on toast.

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Why did the man Iorn his face? Because he felt like it.

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O.J. Simpson. What would you do in that situation?

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A legless and armless woman is laying on the beach. A man walks by and hears her crying. "What's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been kissed before" says the woman. So the man leans down and kisses her. The next day the man sees the woman crying at the beach again. "What's wrong this time?" asks the man. "I've never been hugged before" So the man picks up the legless and armless woman and gives her a big hug. The next day the man sees the woman still on the beach crying. "Okay now what's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been f---ked before" says the woman. So the man picks up the woman, and has sex with her. They end up going on several dates later on and getting married at sunset on the very beach where they met.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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