What has two legs but can't walk? A quadriplegic man who lost mobility in his legs due to a horrific logging accident.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got hit by a bus.

What's large, green, and pissed off? The dumpster out back

how do you save a black guy from drowning. with a life preserver.

Old guitars sound like cat's guts

FUCK YOU NEVEN

What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can? The grief the family feels at the loss of their firstborn child.

No, we are all different, none of us are the same, you however, have no match, your ability to think influence and inspire even today, is unmatched. It is he who is unmatched, who stands alone.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting ran over by a truck.

Did you hear about the Blonde who fell off a cliff You Have? Oh Ok, Have a nice day

How do you make a Russian baby cry? Punch it in the face

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=LJP1DphOWPs#!

There was a man who had a camel, but one day he lost his camel. He wanted to go and look for it but he couldnt because he had to go to work. So the next morning he went to look for his camel. He went over the road and saw a gate, but he couldnt through because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate and saw a forest, but he couldnt through because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest and saw a hill,but he couldnt go down the hill because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill and saw a river,but he couldnt go over the river because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river and saw a house, but he couldnt go to the house because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river, to the house and saw a door, but he couldnt knock on the door because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river, to the house, knocked on the door, and saw a man, but he couldnt speak to the man because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river, to the house, knocked on the door, saw a man, and asked the man, "have you seen my camel?", but the man couldnt respond because he had to go to work The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river, to the house, knocked on the door, saw a man, and asked the man, "have you seen my camel?", and the man said, "no"

What did the doctor say to the camel with no hump? You're a horse.

Why did someone see a penguin walking in the desert? They were dreaming, because Penguins waddle and live in the Arctic.

A man walks into a bar. He is an alcoholic, so to make his activities in the bar into a joke would be disrespectful and inconsiderate.

What did the cow say to the chicken? Moo.

Q: What is the difference between a duck? A: That question doesn't make any sense.

I have a red ferrari and 20 dead babies in my garage. Didn't I have a blue ferrari?

Women's rights.

3 women are eating popsicles, one is biting, one is licking, and one is sucking, which is married? The one with the wedding ring.

bob saget

What is black and blue and red all over? Rihanna

Why does snoop dogg carry around an umbrella?? ......fo drizzle

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...