Why did the man have an erection? He had just masturbated.

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Where does Osama bin Laden do his shopping? He doesn't, he's dead.

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Why didn't the baby cry? It was stillborn.

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Anti-joke.

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The nurse at a hospital came out of the delivery room and chucked the baby down the hall to the father. The dad starts crying and the nurse starts laughing and said, "It's ok, it was already dead."

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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Can a man reproduce with only one testicle? No because girls don't dig that sh*t

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I slipped you some roofies You'll be out in a few

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How do you confuse an idiot? By confusing an idiot.

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Once I asked a Chinese girl , how do I look ? . She said you Europeans all look the same .

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"Free to play" Play free "right now"

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What does the alien say to the man? Nothing, because it is highly unlikely that an alien would ever land on Earth, and even more unlikely that they would speak the same language of us. On top of that, aliens would not know anything about our species, and would probably hide from us due to being frightened and eventually flee back to their home planet where we would never see them again because our techonology is not advanced enough and the chances that we would find their planet which is somewhere among the billions of planets in the universe, are slim.

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Your momma went to the gym, because she is fat.

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Q: Whats the difference between a Chicken and Your Mom? A: I dont eat the chicken

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Why is a banana yellow? I don't know, ask a scientist, stupid

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What do you call a loser on a game? A Dirty Hacker

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what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding several worms in your apple.

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Sophie Cameron is Gay

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a man walked into a store got what he wanted and left.

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What do you call you're mum? Depends who's reading it or just mum

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Wanna know something fishy? A fish

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Why did the blonde laugh at the funeral? She suffers from autism, and doesn't understand when it isn't appropriate to laugh. The mourners at the funeral, understanding this problem, ignored her and carried on with the service.

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I went to the doctors the other day for a check up and the doctors says to me "sorry your going to have to stop wanking" and I say to him " what! Why?" and the doctor says "I'm trying to examine you".

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Roses are red violets are orange......... Wait did I do that wrong?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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