Q: How can you fit 1000 jews in one car? A: The Ashtray

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Why shouldn't you ask Lebron James for change for a dollar? Because in the year 2013 Lebron will tear his ACL and will never able to play the game again. He then won't be able to land a job because he never finished college. After being unable to land a job, he then develops an expensive crack addiction. His house gets foreclosed, and he becomes broke. And is then a homeless broke man who does not even have 4 quarters to his name.

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The skeleton walks into a bar. Everyone is confused and leaves.

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What worse than the holocaust? Dries Roelvink!

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Q: Where did little Suzie go during the bombing? A:Everywhere

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Q.what does the kid scream when he see's a creepy man in a big van pull up? A. ICE CREAM!

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Why did the little boy drown? He was stapled to a whale.

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Yo mamma's so old... oh way no she's dead

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knock knock whose there? my penis.

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Whats blue and smells like red paint? If you know the answer then you should probably stop sniffing paint.

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Do you wanna hear a Ebola joke? You probably won't get it

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HEY YOU!!! just checking for assholes

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road, and then come back halfway? A: He was racing his friend to the other side. He didn't realize his friend got hit by a truck until he looked back. He continually cried until finally he got it together and walked over to his dead friend. He wasn't paying attention though, and another truck hit him. The truck driver continued his road trip and bought KFC for dinner.

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What did one baby say to the other? Nothing, they're both dead.

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how many Mexicans does it take to fix a light bulb? One, a Mexican can fix any thing.

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An Englishman, Irishman, and Jew walk into a bar. Steven Spielberg is a Jew.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Less than you cuz your fat.

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Whats big brown and sticky A sappy oak tree

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What are we then hypocrites?

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The Pope

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Why did the african man wear no clothes? Because he liked being naked.

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What did the dog say to the cat? Nothing.

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck Norris? well no one knows for certain, but they do know there's alot of fridges involved

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Your moms face is turning purple. I'm coming for you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops