what do you sit on, poop on, and sleep on? a bed, a toilet, and a chair

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Why don't women need watches? Because most people carry cell phones that tells them the time making watches redundant and obsolete.

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Roses are grey, violets are grey, I am color blind.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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An Englishman, Irishman, and Jew walk into a bar. Steven Spielberg is a Jew.

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raping black women

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Does your face hurt? Because if it does, you might want to see a doctor.

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What would make a black guy sad? His mom dying on death bed...

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Why couldn't the basketball player jump anymore? Because he broke his back.

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Yo mama so stupid She took in part of an experiment and was indeed proclaimed stupid.

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? 9/11

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Henry: Say the word "really". Moe: Really. Henry: Now say the word "really" with sarcasm. Moe: Really? Henry: More sarcasm! I want you to be very sarcastic! Moe: Oh really??? Henry: There ya go!

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Yo momma's so fat, that she was put in this joke

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Robin, get in the batmobile.

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What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? You aren't married to a girlfriend.

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What did the famed say when he lost his tractor I lost my tractor!!!!

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? Wanna go bike riding?

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Why did the little boy drown? He was stapled to a whale.

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THAT MAN EATS TOO MUCH. therefore he is overweight.

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Three bars walk into a Jew.

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hi

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The screams were loud. It was just one big fire behind him. He and his fellow chickens had been trapped. They thought they were being freed... They thought wrong. The guards herded them in and then the heat started. The fires began to rage. His friends, his allies, his brothers, were falling dead, burning, beside him. He had to escape. He did not think, only acted. Lashing out at the guard, he knocked him down and ran. He ran and ran until he could run no more, and he still kept running. He could still hear his brothers' screams. He could still see their faces burning before his eyes. He reached the road, and finally stopped. He looked around. The screams had stopped. The heat had left his body. But then another sound came. Yelling. The guards. They were following him. He tried to keep running. But he just couldn't. He was finished. He fell on the road, sliding himself along as quickly as he could. He hadn't run this far to be caught by the guards. He stopped. He could go no further. He looked up and saw the blue sky, cloudless and free. The last thing he heard was a roaring engine. The guards never found his body.

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Q: Where did Bethany hide the dead baby? A: In the trash can

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How do you make a Jew cry? You kill all of their friends and family members.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops