Doctor doctor, I came here as quickly as possible, it was just the nearest place I could find. My dog he... he's panting and bleeding and I don't know what to do I think he's dying and I just want him to hold on... Please... Well then go to a vet you stupid shit.

What do you say to a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, she's already been told twice.

i was raised in a bad family. i was the youngest and i was abused then i died three years back. then i died again and then i died again then i died again then again then i LIVED but then i died again then i died again then i died again then i died again

Why couldn't the mexican feed his family? Because a large percent of mexican immigrants in the United States do not have jobs due to dicrimination against illegal immigrants crossing the soutern border, thus rendering them more vunerable to unemployment is that is vastly present in the United States.

i jack off in the school bathroom #yolo -toby limbers

What did the Priest say to the Rabbi? Nothing. The Priest was mute and the Rabbi was deaf.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it.

What the small boy with no arms or legs get fro christmas???? cancer

Why couldn't the Black man become a surgeon? He was Blind.

Why did the school bus crash? The driver was a loaf of bread.

Why did the British person go to the dentist? He had a poor diet which led to him getting cavities

Its a bird! No, it's a plane! Oh... so it is.

roses are red violets are blue my cat died and i have alsheimers who are you

yo mama so fat, her favorite food is seconds.

A man walks into a bar Then another man shoots him in the head because he has anger issues.

Excuse me, do you happen to have the time? No.

Why was the women's basketball player laughed at. The slippery floor caused her to stumble and fall.

Your mom's so hairy, she should go to the barber!

Whats the diffrence between a boy scout and a Jew? The boy scout comes back from camp.

What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? You aren't married to a girlfriend.

What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

A blind guy walks into a bar because he can't see.

Q: What did Cyclops say to Wolverine? A: "We're both X-Men!"

Q:how many anti jokes does it take to make a person lough A:1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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