How do u get a baby to stop choking? Take ur c*ck out if its mouth!!!

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what did the american say to the other american? get out of the way i gotta go to mcdonalds!

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What causes floods? Too much water.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? A Boy Scout comes home from camp.

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How do you kill half of Mexico? You use nuclear weapons in major cities.

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call me a bitch You're a bitch Only bitches do what they are told!

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What's worse than the holocaust? The sun exploding.

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A red-head, a brunette, and a blonde are playing hide-and-seek. Hide-and-seek is a fun game, so they probably had a great time.

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What's larger than a grandmother clock? Plenty of things.

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YOUIR MAMA IS SO UGLY THAT SHE MIGHT WANT TO LOOK INTO PLASTIC SURGERY TO BETTER HER APPEARENCE

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What is grey and looks like a rock? A rock

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A zebra was on his way to a water hole. On the way he met 6 giraffes. Each giraffes had 3 monkeys around their neck. Each monkey had 2 birds on their head. How many animals went to the water hole? A:One, the zebra.

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Knock knock? Who's there? A Jehovah's Witness. Oh. Knock knock? Who's there? Not me!

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knock knock, whos there? your neighbor's cat..no not really, but your sister just got raped

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SHEA CAPOLUPO HAS A TINY SHLONG. 8- turn your head sideways haha.

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whats worse than being ugly? being aivy.

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whats retarded and looks like a fat duck? GEorge goodburn

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Q: Who lives in a pinaple under the sea? A: Garry

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who's best is friend is really good looking? James Cornish

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What happened when john pelted susie with a rock? she had a temporary concusion, needed eight stitches and John was grounded

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Whats hotter than the sun? Larger stars.

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^that joke a piece of shit

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Why did the little boy fall of his swing? Some one killed him.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Six isn't actually afraid of seven. It is true that seven devoured nine's carcass, but one has to understand that cannibalism is not a taboo in their culture. It is ignorant and offensive to judge the world of cardinal numbers, where protein is precious and leaving corpses to rot is dangerously unsanitary, by the standards of human societies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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