What did Stephen Hawkins say to President Obama? He didn't his computer did.

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What do you call 500,000 white guys jumping out of a plane? There's no such thing. 500,000 people can't fit onto one plane.

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What's black and white and read all over? A zebra family that was just murdered by African poachers.

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Paul howley can't drive, phahahaha

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What did Taylor say to the other Taylor? Hi, my name is Taylor

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What is black and blue and red all over? Rihanna

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why did summer hit the child because the child is jackson

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Why wasn't there a rainbow? It didn't rain.

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What do you call a politician on fire? A tragic death for the American public..

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wanna hear a joke? no.

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A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released into a nearby park.

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A man has only two fingers on one hand, and everybody calls him two-fingered Mike. Why? Because his fingers were lost in a tragic accident at birth, and his parents, who were considering calling him Mike, decided to lengthen the name because it seemed appropriate.

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Can Geico save save you 50% on your car insurance? Does a former drill sergent make a terrible therapist?

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What has one eye, three arms and one leg? A really weird person.

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Don't you hate it when your reading a sentence and it doesn't end how you testicles.

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How did the blonde girl get pregnant? Her boyfriend used a condom left in his pants and then was washed. Making it defective and causing her her to become pregnant.

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how much dub would a dubstep step if a dubstep could step dub? purple

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There is a bomb. It blows up and kills 26 people.

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If the red house is made out of red bricks, the yellow house is made out of yellow bricks, and the blue house is made out of blue bricks, what is the greenhouse made of? Ah, I see what you did there. You are expecting me to follow the sequence based on how each house is made out of bricks the same color as their title. However, I am one step ahead of you and I know that the greenhouse is made out of glass panels. But what if it were made out of green glass panels? Then, I suppose, the sequence could continue naturally yet we still have a problem of units - bricks vs. glass. Quite the dilemma we are facing.

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Q, whats worst then being trapped in a house with a ghost. A, being trapped in a house with thirteen ghosts.

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Batman, Superman, Spiderman and Wonder Woman walk into a bar. The bartender decides to ruin the joke by saying nothing.

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Why did the boy get hit by the bus? He didn't check both sides before crossing

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Ask if I'm a aardvark. Are you a aardvark? Yes.

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What did the carrot say when it was thrown out of an airplane? Nothing. It's a carrot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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