A. Do you know what they call Bing Crosby in Sweden? B. No. A. Bing Crosby.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you call putting a vehicle on the side of the road? Parking.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

whats woorse then being stupid? kaelynn... aka big head

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What is the difference between a dead baby in a blender and a rock? There are many differences. One of them is the fact that I don't masturbate to a rock.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Your mother is so unintelligent that her IQ score is equal to or lower than 2 standard deviations below the national average of 100 on the Mensa approved intelligence test that has been properly administered and supervised.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A man walks into a bar and says "I'd like a beer."

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's black and very long? The line-up at KFC.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you call a special Ed walrus? Anorexic pony ???? Discovering that a convicted sex offenderi is living nearby stirs up a range of feelings: fear, anger, insecurity and anxiety. There are many things you can do to make the situation more manageable - and channel these emotions into actions that address situations that put children most at risk for sexual harm. Learn how to identify the most common threats and concerns. Then find out the best ways you can join with others to keep everyone safe. Take action! Learn how to keep children safe Get the FAQs about the sex offender registryi Download our Tip Sheet:  Concerned about Sex Offenders in Your Neighborhood?

thumb_up thumb_down -11

how do you make a plumber cry? you kill his family

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the man go bald? He had cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -13

whats blue and fuzzy?.... blue fuzz

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q: what animal didnt get on Noah's ark in pairs? A: worms. they got on in apples.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

No.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A Mime travels to Africa for a vacation. He meets a Zebra in his travels and the Zebra says "Hey we both are wearing black and white stripes!" The Mime did not understand the Zebra because he cannot talk his language so he continues on with his vacation.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

your momma is so stupid it took her 2 hours to watch 60 minutes

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the bunny cross the road? It didn't, It was hit by a truck...

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Womans profesional lacrosse

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A midget walks into a bar. No one cares.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did Billy drop his ice cream? He found out his family was killed in a terrorist attack.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar and orders a beer. Just kidding, he can't walk.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Girl: what comes after 69? Boy: 70. Girl: no,toothpaste! Boy: ...

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's behind Chuck Norris' beard? His chin

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Everytime God shuts a door, he opens a window, at the 122th floor of a skyskraper.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops