How many licks did it take for the little boy to get to the center of the Tootsie Pop? Three, and then he choked and died.

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Why? Whats wrong?

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Why did the man have an erection? He had just masturbated.

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Why don't NBA basketball players shake hands after a game like players in NHL hockey...? ...Because it's a tradition in then NHL.

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So I went to my grandmothers house at 7 and left at 8.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 ate a dude's face.

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Trees are like friends. They both fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

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Whats worse than a dead whore? 9/11

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Hello? Hi. Who is this? Yo mom. Your not my mom. Im the Irish man that did your mom.

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This is a little story about four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, and Nobody. There was an important job to be done and Everybody was sure that Somebody would do it. Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did it. Somebody got angry about that because it was Everybody's job. Everybody thought that Anybody could do it, but Nobody realized that Everybody wouldn't do it. It ended up that Everybody blamed Somebody when Nobody did what Anybody could have done

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Whis a racist rapist etter than a non-racist rapist? less women getting raped

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What happened when a man drove up to an escort and said "want to check my bags?" The escort replied "Certainly, sir" due to the fact the escort worked at a hotel.

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They took away privileges that she normally would have had had she not misbehaved.

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Ring Around The rosy, Pockets full of posey, Just kidding they are roofies and i'm going to rape you

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What did the the boy get from his grandma for Christmas. Nothing. she died a week ago.

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What did the Bishop say to the pebble? Wash my car

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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? usually one new yorker.

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what does gum eat ? gum you idiot!

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What's worse than Bieber fever? Yellow fever.

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I'm Donald Trump! Wump wump wump!

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Why is a banana yellow? I don't know, ask a scientist, stupid

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Why did the dog have 2 legs? he got cut in half.

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Why do African-American people like fried chicken and watermelon? Because they are delicious food items.

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A hispanic lesbian couple accidentally walk into a country western themed bar. And leave immediately as a bar is no place for their 2 year old son.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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