Why did the chicken sneeze? Because someone put pepper on its nose.

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Jaden McMichael

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Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: Where's my tractor?

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yo mommas so ugly that everyone died.

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How do you starve a celebrity? Tell them they're fat.

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What did the soldier say when he got shot in the face? Nothing, he died.

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What does the alien say to the man? Nothing, because it is highly unlikely that an alien would ever land on Earth, and even more unlikely that they would speak the same language of us. On top of that, aliens would not know anything about our species, and would probably hide from us due to being frightened and eventually flee back to their home planet where we would never see them again because our techonology is not advanced enough and the chances that we would find their planet which is somewhere among the billions of planets in the universe, are slim.

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Whats a black persons favorite flavored cake? fried chicken.

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what makes the world go round? An axis (just jokin, its COFFEE)

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Where does Osama bin Laden do his shopping? He doesn't, he's dead.

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A Guy walks into a bar Ouch

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why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the retard's house *knock knock* who's there? the chicken

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Have you seen Helen Keller's back porch? Neither did she.

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Yo momma so fat, people snicker as they walk past her, quietly laughing at a women obviously struggling with obesity. They then proceed to stop laughing, as they realize that their mother died from diabetes. They then proceed to move on with their day.

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A man walks through a doorway but there was a door there so he got injured

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Why do sea guls fly over the sea? In order to get from place to place, flying is much faster than walking. Sea guls live on a diet of salt-water fish, and the ocean is where their main food supply subsides.

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girl: why do you love me? boy: i don't.

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I went to the doctors the other day for a check up and the doctors says to me "sorry your going to have to stop wanking" and I say to him " what! Why?" and the doctor says "I'm trying to examine you".

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What's funnier than 24? 25

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Why did the man wear a blue shirt? He didn't. He wore a green one.

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How many morman minutes does it take to get to school? A lightyear

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Roses are red, Violets are blue when I saw you what the heel are you

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One day a black man, a white man, and an Asian man decide to bet on who has the longest penis. The white man wins by 1/18th of an inch, effectively disproving the stereotype. They all go home a little gayer for the experience.

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What is a Mexican's favorite restaurant? While the term "Mexican" encompasses a wide range of individuals and individual predilections, the most common cibarious preference would likely be a food that is reminiscent of his or her homeland; that is, what we refer to as Mexican food. An authentic nearby joint sporting such provisions would likely be the most common preference, but, as this description can only be traced on the local scale, a specific restaurant that covers a wider range of locations would be a more appropriate answer. Among the top choices are Taco Time and Taco Del Mar.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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