What did the deaf, dumb, blind, black kid get for Christmas? Modern Warfare 3.

What do you get when you cross something with another thing that one would normally not cross with the aforementioned noun? A better love story than Twilight.

A man walks in a barn. He lifts his bucket of food and starts feeding his horses.

How come Kristin cant go play soccer anymore? She broke her leg kicking her brother in the face.

What's worse than a tornado that kills your whole whole family? Nothing.

How can you shed 10 pounds in one day? Get your legs amputed.

What is purple and crawls? A wounded grape.

How do you kill Chuck Norris? Short Answer: You can't.

What is the definition of a "crying shame"? Very similar to the definition of a shame, but moreso.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she has no arms.

a chicken crosses the street to ask a man: what is an anti-joke? the man replies: a joke the chicken responds: so why do they call it an ANTI-joke? the man answers: why did the horse walk into a bar? the chicken retorts: you can't answer a question with a question! the man replies: you're a figment of my imagination, nah nah nah nah i can't hear you.

Yo mama's so fat that she takes too muc oh fuck it I'm stuffed Henri and Chaz

why did helen cellars dog runway. you would to if ur name was ujujujujjujujujujujj

Q: how do you stop a blonde woman from drowning? A: unplug the stopper in the bathtub Q: how do you stop a baby from drowning? A: take your foot off its head

Why did the boy not wake up on time for school? He was fuck in dead.

What's the difference between a Lamborghini and 10 dead babies? I don't keep a Lamborghini I'm my garage

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident, you're entire family is dead.

whats funnier than a joke? A: a funnier joke

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Suzie

what do you call cheese that isn't yours? Chuck Norris' Cheese

One time I masturbated by myself

Have you heard the one about the Norwegian? He killed 98 people.

OY SHIT ITS YOUR MOM!!!

a blonde, a brunette and a red head are robbing a bank, they hear the police coming, so they try to find a place to hide. The red head hides in cat cage, the brunette hides in dog cage and the blonde hides in potatoe sack. When the police come the brunetter says "Woof, Woof!" the red head says "MEOW! MEOW!" and the blonde says "P-O-T-A-T-O-E!"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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