where are the maternaty clothing in walmart???? The C section

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Q: What do you get when you mix a joke with a rhetorical question?

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Why did the white man go to jail? He broke the law.

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What do you call an 8 foot anxious priest painted purple named harold? Harold.

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Why couldn't Sally ride a bicycle? She doesn't have a bicycle. She also doesn't have legs.

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What is the difference between baseball and the holocaust? One is a fun sporting event…. The other is baseball.

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What did the virgin get for her birthday? Aids

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a convicted serial killer.

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What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

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Knock, knock. Whose there? Tits. Tits, who? SUCK EM'!

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? seriously all my friends r jerks n break the door down...wow ur polite....um ok WHO'S THERE? THE REAPER oh sh** dude! NO ONES HOME! "in other news this evening, two local men found dead on theyre living room floors. Police say the front door was smashed in...an obvious sign of forced entry. The two men were apparently reading a webpage called anti-joke before suddenly having an unexplained heart attack and dieing....heh heh hey nancy...why did the chicken cross the road? because he thuroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic." "HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.......GASP! GA FA! GAA *gargle*" "wow...in other OTHER news i just killed nancy...."*runs* JOKES KILL >:}

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Roses are red, violets are blue a face like yours belongs in a zoo. Don't you worry I'll be there too, not in the cage but laughing at you.

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The daring man said "here goes nothing." And nothing happened. -Tag

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What did one muffin say to the other in the oven? Nothing. They're muffins.

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I took a dump in a well don't ask me i'll never tell i look to u as it fell and now its in the well Hey,i just took a dump and it smells like crazy so here's my number so call the plumber Call the plumber

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Knock, Knock! Who's There? Your neighbor, I found your lost cat! Oh thanks!

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Police say's 'have you been drinking' and you reply back saying 'YES' then the police brings out the blower and you blow, it says on it that you are fine, but then the cops ask you 'what did you drink' and you just say 'well i drank juice for breakfast then had some water, tea, coffee' the cops get really angry but before he says anything you say that ' I AM MUSLIM'

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Communism, Capitalism and an Irish man walk into a bar. Communism says, “I’ll buy the drinks but I require your complete obedient consent.” Capitalism says, “No I’ll buy the drinks but I require that you pay me back with interest” and the Irish man says “No I… I don’t feel very well at all… Oh shite I’ve got the bloody runs!” He then proceeds to shit myself.

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There's three sisters: a blonde, a brunette and a redhead. They know she's not they're real mom.

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Why was the old man on the floor? He fell

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why did sally fall off the swing? because she was a fish.

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why did the holocaust not die because black people are scared of fuck

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Women.

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Doctor: Knock, Knock Woman: Who's there? Doctor: Interrupting Doctor Woman: Interupt- Doctor: You have cancer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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