How did the blonde burn her ear? In a terrible accident involving molten lava.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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What is long and black The unemployment line

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"jrfevkhbgjk" said the retard.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have amnesia Roses are red

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how do you kill a blonde? hit her in the back repeatedly with a crowbar

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Why did Kelly never see Wass? cus she never looked in right places !!!

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What is worse than the holocaust? 2 holocausts

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman says "Why the long face?" The horse, being unable to understand the barman, breaks a table and shits on the floor.

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Why couldn't Sally ride a bicycle? She doesn't have a bicycle. She also doesn't have legs.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse, thus lacking cognitive capacity to speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and promptly defecates on the floor then gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few chairs and tables.

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Who is the worst teacher ever? Mrs. Thompson

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why did the puppy poop? he had too

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How do you drown a blonde? You hold her head underwater for a long time.

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How did the black man get to work this morning? He didn't. He had been struggling with depression and finally this morning, he committed suicide.

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What do you call a mexican riding a lawnmower? Promoted

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whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew?... Nevermind, that was a stupid question.

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Wanna know something fishy? A fish

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I just flew in from Chicago and boy are my legs cramped

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Q: What's worse than being forced to eat your veggies? A: Being forced to kill your parents with a carrot.

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What did the Penis say to the Condom? Nothing. The human organ is not able to talk to another inanimate object, therefore it's impossible.

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Why did the asian man crash into the stop sign? Because there was a frog stapled to his face.

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Why did the dog stop barking. It was given a good reason to.

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A serial killer kills a family of 5 He is never found and eventually kills himself from depression

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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