Hi

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what did the left nut say to the right nut? The guy above us is a real dick huh?

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why do you care?

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? You hit it in the face with an axe.

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Why did the vegetarian lose her foot? Diabetes.

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Joe: Hey, why are your counters all red and your blender looks broken? Me: The same reason why Mrs. Johnson's baby is missing. ajl

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is blind and deaf, and to put her behind the wheel of a motorized vehicle would be extremely dangerous.

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.......ah shit i forgotten the joke

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DESERT

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A tiger walks into a bar, the patrons ran out terrified.

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What did the Beatrice do after she got kicked off of X Factor? she went to a nearby store and bought a slim jim

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A white guy, a black guy, an Indian guy, and a Jewish guy walk into a bar. They drink in moderation and discuss their children, the current state of the economy, and global politics before retiring home to their families.

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Wow, so it is true, you are here the entire fucking time aren't you bitch? You and all "six billion of your followers of the dark", listen asshead, one thing is people asking ME when I FUCKING SIGN BOOKS (which does not happen all that FUCKING OFTEN!) Why I lead a fucking cult of sorts. Another one is having your goons stab me in the FUCKING EYE, and going "Oh I am like so sorry, please let me be the gayest I can be" People assaulting me because I use the "Moralman identity" IT IS MINE! My real FUCKING NAME IS NERO! I DON'T GO AROUND STEALING NOBODY`S SHIT!

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Two rabbis standing at the buffet cart. The first exclaims "Oy vey, those pork chops look good!". The second shrugs, turns to his friend and remarks, "So do your wife's norks".

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An Englishman, and Irishman, and a Scottsman walk into a bar and the bartender says, "Is this some kind of a joke?"

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Ask me if I'm a kangaroo Are you a Kangaroo? No….

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why did suzy drop her ice cream? she got hit by a bus. knock knock! who's there? not suzy.

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Are you from Tenessee? I heard you were from there

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What's funny about the holocaust? Nothing. Whoever thinks the holocaust is funny is a dick.

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Yo mamma's so old... oh way no she's dead

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Why did the little boy drown? He was stapled to a whale.

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What did the booger say the other booger? "Is he picking on you again"

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Knock Knock Who's There? The Police The Police Who? Uhm, Ma'am your son just died in a car wreck

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How do you confuse a blonde? Speak to her in a nonsensical language of gibberish you have devised without her being able to understand or translate.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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