What did John the accountant do when he saw a flying dog, He woke up from a wonderful dream and started his day

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what do you call a fish with no eyes fsh

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Why do guys like Halloween? Martin Luther posted the 95 theses in 1517 on this day.

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What do you call a black guy and a mexican guy walking into a bar, A couple of multicultural friends grabbin' a drink.

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Usually, the bad (anti) jokes are the ones that don't make you laugh. Sometimes you laugh "with" the joke, other times, you laugh at the joke itself because it is a paragon for human failure. The jokes on this website are not exempt from that rigid stipulation. However, it should be noted that all the "jokes" on this particular website are actually hilarious because of the latter reason delineated in the above paragraph. Additionally, this joke was created by a machine and thus the originator of this work is by no means able to learn from the process of trial and error and therfore can make myriad unfunny jokes without compromise.

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Woman's Rights

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What do you call an Arab flying a plane? A pilot.

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What did the mute person say to the deaf person? Nothing.

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A Muslim, a Jew, and a Christian find a magical lamp with a genie inside. He offers each of them one wish. The Muslim wishes that people didn't look at his people as terrorists. The Jew wishes that the Holocaust never happened, and the Christian wishes for world peace. Actually this didn't happen, Genies don't exist.

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what happened to the boy who crossed the street. he got shot by a bus

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what did the chinese guy say to the black guy? hello

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Why did the bus fall down? It was hit by a bus and then repeatedly battered by a blender

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Tulips are red. My garden is on fire.

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roses are red violets are blue i ate a peanut lets go have sex

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What did Helen Keller see on her trip? Nothing

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Why did the baboon fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why did Helen Keller's cat kill itself? It didn't, I did.

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Why did the redneck ask his daughter to get on her knees? His shoe was untied.

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What is better than a cat? Nothing

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roses are violets red is blue i like doughnuts doughnuts are good

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What happened to all of the happy birds flying over the field? They were all suddenly stricken by the bird flu and died.

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What did the sting ray say to steve irwin? It doesn't matter , steve irwin is dead, dead as a doormat.

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How do you kill a circus? Go for the Juggler!

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Heat oven to 375°. Grease 18 regular-size muffin cups (or 12 large size muffins). In bowl, mix butter until creamy. ... Add eggs one at a time, beating after each. Beat in vanilla, baking powder and salt. With spoon, fold in half of flour then half of milk into batter; repeat. Fold in blueberries.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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