national song of the mute person? 5 minutes of silence please

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Jews.

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What happened when the irishman left the bar? he didnt

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who drinks pee? katness

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Whats worse than having a woman faking an orgasm? Having a guy fake one.

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Hello penis

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What happens 2 seconds after you thorw a rock out a two-story window? The rock hits the ground.

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How do you make a clown sad? Kill his family.

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I was in the middle of downloading a porno of two hot girls getting it on, my computer got a virus and crashed.

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Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

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When life gives you lemons you can't make lemonade! Life is not a person, place, or thing that is able to physically hand you something! But, you can go to your local grocery store and buy some lemons.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? If so, you're probably a pervert.

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What's the difference between Justin Beeber and a Basett hound? I don't know.

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a weird guy tickled a watermelon.

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Whats worse than dying? Nothing, really.

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What did the the policeman say to the band member who trashed a hotel room? "You're under arrest" The band member replied "Well, you're under a vest" The policeman reiterates that this isn't the time to be making any jokes and that vandalism is a very serious offence

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

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Why did the man have 3 girlfriends? A: because he is a womanizer

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Roses are red Roses are pink Roses are yellow Roses are white

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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Why do priest touch children? They are sexually deprived and frustrated because their religion forbids them from having a normal sexual relationship with the opposite sex.

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Knock Knock There was no answer as the house was empty.

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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