Why was the baby crying? It wasn't it got hit by a bus and died.

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Were can you find a bag of meth? A drug dealer

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What do you call one black guy surrounded by eleven white guys? Wayne Simmonds

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An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Why did the blonde buy a hotdog? She didn't. She has chronic anorexia.

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Why did the man get off the bus? Penis

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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what's red and green and goes 100 mph? a red and green car going over the speed limit.

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why was the man a redneck? because he got sunburned at the nascar race.

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knock knock whos there not me

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects and can therefore not speak.

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Tell somebody that someone told you they look like an owl. When they say "Who?" laugh in their face

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A man violently rapes a small child. Unfortunately the child has aids and gives them to the man.

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Why did the man fall off the swing? he got hit in the back of the head with a shovel.

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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So Doc... Do I have H.I.V or not? Well... Lets just say you should think positive now... NO! I CANNOT LIVE LIKE THIS *Jumps out window* ...Because the results might not appear correctl... OH you do not have... Where did you go? Phew, Good thing it was first floor! Dont be silly, you dont have an immune system which means you have full blown AIDS

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What is round and will hurt you if you step on it? The sun

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What did the gay logger do to the tree with a hole in it? Cut it down.

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What do you call a white person on a leash? A toddler.

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Ever hear the joke about the black guy going to jail its not a joke.

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Max who Max Who's there Knock knock I'm dyslexic

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What is worse than the Holocaust? a Michael Bay movie

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ask me if im poop are you poop? no that is impoible

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ive got a joke for you Nicki minajs ase

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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