Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

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I'm the rubber and you're the glue, whatever you say sends vibrations through the air that hit my eardrum and my brain interprets these vibrations as what your are saying.

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Q: What does 'A' stand for? A: Effort

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whats worse that 3 black guys dieing in a train accident .... one was ur brother the other was gay

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Whats worse than having a woman faking an orgasm? Having a guy fake one.

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People eat. Thats because we poop. No its the other way around. Sloppy Joes. Thats what my poop looks like. Oh no im eating poop in between two buns!

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Q. What did Grandmother get Little Boy Johnny for Christmas? A. Nothing. She died on Thanksgiving Day.

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Why did the man cross the road? Because that it where his friend Bob lives.

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How do you make a clown sad? Kill his family.

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9/11

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What do you Call L.L. Cool J's mexican cousin? El El Bean

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What's rock hard and is sharp? A rock...and my penis.

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Why was the bear gay. He grew up in a disfunctional home.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? If so, you're probably a pervert.

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What's the difference between Justin Beeber and a Basett hound? I don't know.

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what do you call a disabled black man getting beat up? an unfortunate human

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Tell somebody that someone told you they look like an owl. When they say "Who?" laugh in their face

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What do you say to a black man on fire... Stop, drop and roll !!!

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What happened when the irishman left the bar? he didnt

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Knock Knock Whos there? The police, we've been getting reports of many ironically named metaphors knocking on your door to which you reply witty utterances, can you explain this frankly quite disturbing behaviour? The police, we've been getting reports of many ironically named metaphors knocking on your door to which you reply witty utterances, can you explain this frankly quite disturbing behaviour who? Wait aren't you the one who's supposed to supposed tell the punchline? Oh Yeah

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? Hello, I'm here to deliver your groceries. Ok thank you, please leave them by the front door.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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How do you kill a baby quickly? The better question is why kill a baby quickly?

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Hi

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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