What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Whats worse than having a woman faking an orgasm? Having a guy fake one.

how do you kill 1000 Ethiopians? throw a mars bar off a cliff!

Poop

Why was the bear gay. He grew up in a disfunctional home.

what did batman say to robin before getting into the car? get in the car.

Grandma walked into the kitchen...

How many black people does it take to change a light bulb. One, of course. Assuming he/she does not have any physical or mental handicaps.

Have you ever seen that clown at walmart that hides from gay people?

Why was the baby crying? It wasn't it got hit by a bus and died.

Why did the blond play Russian roulette? She is very poor and needs the money so she can feed her son.

Two men and a woman walk into a bar. They are all viciously murdered by a serial killer, who as he walks out, runs into a pole and suffers from a concussion, which he later dies from.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he can't fly

What is worse than the Holocaust? a Michael Bay movie

Why do vampires suck the blood of their victims? Because blood is very nutritious and provides more iron for heamoglobin.

What's white and hides behind a tree? Shy milk.

Why did the man pick the flower? Because he didn't like flowers.

Whats worse than a blonde jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car, and orphaning two little girls who are beat in the orphanage and become homeless and unimportant and consequently jumping off bridges themselves?

I was in the middle of downloading a porno of two hot girls getting it on, my computer got a virus and crashed.

Jim: Can you shoot a basketball with one hand? Moe: There's no such thing as a basketball with one hand.

What do you get when you cross some eggs and some toast? Breakfast.

What's green and invisible? This cabbage

What has 142 teeth and can hold back the hulk? My zipper.

What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? He received many presents because his parents loved him very much.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...