What do you get when you cross some eggs and some toast? Breakfast.

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What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rihno? Rihno-elephant

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Q: Why did the little girl upset? A: Because she was part of the human centipede

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My doctor recommended I take anger management classes. That really pisses me off.

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There was a goat and it was eating McDonalds, I just farted and my nuts are itchy.

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What do you call a chicken with it's head chopped off. A decapitated chicken.

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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Why did nick and tyler visit anti-joke.com? Because they have nothing better to do.

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Rosa Parks is going to be here if she gets to the bus on time!

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Yo mama so fat, she was accepted to a clinical trial for treatment of morbid obesity in middle-aged women.

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What did 6 say to 7? Nothing, numbers are abstract concepts thought up by humans and therefore, they cannot speak or converse in any sort of language.

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What's better than winning a gold medal in the Special Olympics? Not being disabled.

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Grandma walked into the kitchen...

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What do you call a man with a bad haircut? A man with a bad haircut

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Knock knock! Who's there? Your mum. Oh hi mum, the doors unlocked

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Last Christmas I gave you my heart... but the very next day your body rejected the transplant and you died.

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I'm color blind.

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LeBron James hits a game winning three with time running out in the Finals.

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Max who Max Who's there Knock knock I'm dyslexic

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Knock-knock. Who's there? The Chicken.

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Hello penis

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Q: Why couldn't Katie ride a bike? A: Because she has leprosy.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What's worse than listening to Justin Beiber? Getting hit by a train.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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