Why didn't Joe's toaster work anymore? Because he dropped it into the bathtub with him.

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room without dinner.

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Why did Charlie Sheen laugh at the TV? Because there happened to be a comedy on.

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A black man and a white man were both pulled over for street racing. They both were also found to be drunk driving. Only the black man was arrested. It turns out the black man had just massacred an entire Amish village before going street racing to celebrate.

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My mumma your mumma live down the street 18,19 marble street out came you and out came me but then your mumma died from her pee

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what did batman say to robin before getting into the car? get in the car.

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a black man and a squirrel get hit on two different roads what's the difference? well for starters theyre two different species. a squirrel is much smaller than a human and has his own mark on society. the man will be missed dearly by his family and if the impact with the car wasnt bad, he may have a chance to make it out alive at the hospital. the squirrel however is not so lucky. it will be left to die on the street or would have died on impact already with sadly no squirrel hospital to tend to it.

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Why does a squid have 8 legs? It doesn't, it has 8 tentacles!

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What's worse than getting a jigsaw puzzle for your birthday? Slavery

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's me Ok, come in (the knockers voice was familiar enough that giving a name would have been out of place)

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LeBron James hits a game winning three with time running out in the Finals.

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Why did the man start crying? Because he lost his job.

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue Bitches Like U Belong In The Zoo

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What do you get when you cross an owl with a bungee cord? My ass

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" So let's set the world on fire..." Q: How do you do that? A: Strike a match...

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Why did the man get off the bus? Penis

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I like pancakes Ouch! That hurt!

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why didn't the drug addict take steroids? he was going to but died due to years of substance abuse

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Why did the chicken cross the road? What kind of society have we created that a chicken can't even cross a road without his motives being questioned?

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So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

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Whats worse than having a woman faking an orgasm? Having a guy fake one.

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i hate anti-jokes ;)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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