Why did the Asian man have a small penis? Because he was flaccid.

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Jim: Can you shoot a basketball with one hand? Moe: There's no such thing as a basketball with one hand.

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Why did the boy eat his bagel? He was hungry.

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Magic is another word for "poorly perceived analysis of the mechanics of this complex instrumentality we call optical illusion."

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Why was the bear gay. He grew up in a disfunctional home.

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What's faster than a black guy with your TV? Probably someone who doesn't have to carry such a heavy object.

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What's white and sticky? Glue.

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What's the difference between Justin Beeber and a Basett hound? I don't know.

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

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What's blue and has two windows ? The sky, i lied about the windows.

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What do you call a white person on a leash? A toddler.

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How do you call blond girl with no arms and no legs ? A victim of a tragic car accident.

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What do a fish and a car have in common? They are both edible.

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Why do chinese firefighters wear white belts in their firefighting uniforms? So the their pants stay up.

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knock knock whos there not me

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Ever heard of a funny black guy? Me either

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why do pedo's molest children? because it feels really good.

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lol

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what is purple and hairy like a bear? A purple bear

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? - It was dead.

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What's the difference between a hooker and an onion? The hooker is a human being whereas the onion is a vegetable.

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What's gold and looks like a brick? A gold brick. What's gold and looks like a nugget? A gold nugget. Whats gold and like a car? Gold. I lied about the car.

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What's brown and sticky? Human excrement.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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