Q: Why can't Elvis Presley drive a car backwards? A: Because he's dead.

why did the kid fall over and break his neck? Because he slipped on the ice-cream from the kid who got hit by a bus.

I'm so hungry I could eat food

I used to be an adventurer like you... then I enlisted for much safer guard service with a more steady salary.

Q: What's Lindsay Lohan getting for Christmas? A: AIDS

roses are red, violets are blue my name is hitler, good bye jew

Why was the Blonde Crying? -because she had just witnessed her infant get sucked through a jet engine and was very sad.

Once upon a time, your face.

9/11

a man died

what do you call a pig that knows karate? pork-chop!

Q: John has 400 cookies, 200 hundred are chocolate chip and the rest are sugar. John eats 100 of each, what does he have now? A: Diabetes

*Knock Knock* Who's there? Hello, I'm here to deliver your groceries. Ok thank you, please leave them by the front door.

It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

What do a fish and a car have in common? They are both edible.

Two gay guys walk into a Hooters... They order cheese fries and enjoy their meal.

if a dinosaurs could talk, what would they say nothing their all dead

A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

Im ashamed of being from Canada

why did the man die? because he died.

Why are you going to thumbs this joke up? Because I use the words "Chuck Norris" Thus making it impossible to not thumbs up.

Jews.

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

You are so gay you frequently, and consentingly are sodomized by men and frivolously enjoy it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...