An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the widow get for mothers day A miscarriage

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's brown and sticky? Human excrement.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do a fish and a car have in common? They are both edible.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

One white male lives in a city with all blacks. He puts up with gang violence nearly every day.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

knock knock whos there not me

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Poop

thumb_up thumb_down -61

9/11

thumb_up thumb_down -67

What's rock hard and is sharp? A rock...and my penis.

thumb_up thumb_down -115

What's the difference between a monkey wrench and a snow cone? A lot.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Q: What is the difference between a tree and a women? A: your mom

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Justin Bieber walks into a Gay-Bar. He is then kindly escorted out because he is underage. Also, because the patrons gave him certain looks that brought concern to the heterosexual bartender.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why did the man fall off the swing? he got hit in the back of the head with a shovel.

thumb_up thumb_down

A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

thumb_up thumb_down

Suzie has no arms and no legs and is on a swing. what happened? she fell and died knock knock whos there? not suzie.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Miss Polly had a Dolly who was sick sick sick So she called for the Doctor to come quick quick quick The doctor came with his bag and his hat And he knocked on the door with a rat-tat-tat. He looked at Polly's Dolly and he shook his head. He said she had leprosy and must have all her limbs amputated.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Max who Max Who's there Knock knock I'm dyslexic

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A Brunette walks in to the docters office and says" Docter it hurts when i poke my self." She then pokes her arm and screams in agony. Then She pokes her leg and screams in agony. The Docter says "Are you really a brunette'' She replys "no im a Blonde." Docter says " oh then you have broken your finger"

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What did the priest say to the rabbi ? I'm gay.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

How did the black man get out of the bathroom? He opened the door.

thumb_up thumb_down -70

Im ashamed of being from Canada

thumb_up thumb_down -162

What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? I don't eat hot dogs. Thank you though.

thumb_up thumb_down +105

what is purple and hairy like a bear? A purple bear

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops