Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he can't fly

thumb_up thumb_down -6

your mammas so fat she has to buy pants in the xxlarge section of the store

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What is round and will hurt you if you step on it? The sun

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the chicken cross the road? What kind of society have we created that a chicken can't even cross a road without his motives being questioned?

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What does a tree and a human have in common? They both fall if you chop them with an axe.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why can't the t-Rex clap..... Because it is dead

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did the President Truman approve the use a nuke over Hiroshima? Sending Chuck Norris was widely considered to be too cruel.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

thumb_up thumb_down -48

Jim: Can you shoot a basketball with one hand? Moe: There's no such thing as a basketball with one hand.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

Ever heard of a funny black guy? Me either

thumb_up thumb_down -66

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? A stimulus in the environment to the receptors in his fingers caused his hand to open no longer gripping the ice cream. Due to this, the ice cream fell to the ground causing a desirable mess for someone to clean up, satisfying themselves with the fact that they have considered the environment during this small ''could happen to anybody'' situation. After the messed was cleaned up, the boy's mother bought him another ice cream, in which case the boy anticipated another potential mess, and held the ice cream carefully. As he did this, he managed to finish eating the whole of the ice cream, allowing no money that was paid for the product to go to waste.

thumb_up thumb_down -174

why did the man die? because he died.

thumb_up thumb_down +127

Justin Bieber walks into a Gay-Bar. He is then kindly escorted out because he is underage. Also, because the patrons gave him certain looks that brought concern to the heterosexual bartender.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

got a new boxing bag the other day its hanging from the top of my stairs its called dead seb

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What did the old lady say when she went to a restaurant? OH look at the price of this salad.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Q: What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? A: They're all gone.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the Dr love drop hit guitar? Because a bear walked into a bar and killed everyone in there including dr love and was then shot to death by police and animal control.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the man start crying? Because he lost his job.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A man goes to his drug dealer to buy Meth, there is no joke here, he is addicted to meth.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

One white male lives in a city with all blacks. He puts up with gang violence nearly every day.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did the man pick the flower? Because he didn't like flowers.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did the chicken cross the road? I have not seen chicken since I was very young, on my parents' farm. This is before the Cossacks slaughtered them. I can still hear screams of sister as soldiers ravaged her. But back to question, where did you see chicken? I am very, very hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme Others don't

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Q: What is the difference between a tree and a women? A: your mom

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops