What did the boy say to the stranger at his door? He said, "i'm not supposed to talk to strangers" and closed the door.

Why did the boy eat the potato? I don't know. Neather do I. :(

What is round and will hurt you if you step on it? The sun

What's brown and sticky? Human excrement.

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

ON THE SEVENTH DAY OF JUNE, THURSDAY HAPPENED!!!! -ilikecrepes97

Q: What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? A: They're all gone.

Why was the baby crying? It wasn't it got hit by a bus and died.

A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

So Doc... Do I have H.I.V or not? Well... Lets just say you should think positive now... NO! I CANNOT LIVE LIKE THIS *Jumps out window* ...Because the results might not appear correctl... OH you do not have... Where did you go? Phew, Good thing it was first floor! Dont be silly, you dont have an immune system which means you have full blown AIDS

Why did the man get off the bus? Penis

One white male lives in a city with all blacks. He puts up with gang violence nearly every day.

Yo mama is so hairy, because she's arab.

I'm the rubber and you're the glue, whatever you say sends vibrations through the air that hit my eardrum and my brain interprets these vibrations as what your are saying.

What did the priest say to the rabbi ? I'm gay.

What happens when you put a squid in the microwave? It dies.

Yo mama so stupid she tried to drown a dog and was quite successful at it. Know she serves a death sentence.

Why does a squid have 8 legs? It doesn't, it has 8 tentacles!

What did the widow get for mothers day A miscarriage

I saw a man one day i saw him the next day and the next and the next i didn't see him ever again

Q: What do you do if you find your tv floating at night? A: Yell "DROP IT NIGGAH!" Q: What do you do if you find your tv floating in the day time? A: Run away cause your house is haunted.

Why did the chicken cross the road? What kind of society have we created that a chicken can't even cross a road without his motives being questioned?

What does a tree and a human have in common? They both fall if you chop them with an axe.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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