Womans profesional lacrosse

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How many Freudians does it take to screw your mother - I mean, a lightbulb?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What happens when a scientist tells you a lie? It's not true.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A man is about to rape a girl. Before penetration he carefully and correctly applies a condom as he practices safe sex and is not yet ready to father a child.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A Chinese man, an American man, and a Mexican man are sitting in an airplane. When the flight attendant comes by with food, the Chinese and American both opt for pretzels, while the Mexican prefers crackers and makes his selection accordingly. The three sit back and enjoy their snacks separately.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

There was a cat, an astronaut and a nun. The cat was sleeping, the astronaut was floating, and the nun was praying. There was a singer, a dancer and an actor. The singer was singing, the dancer was dancing, and the actor was acting.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really pissed. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!" The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway. Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, brought the box back in the house. She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale. Bob has been missing since Friday.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

3 men check in to a motel. They all decide to leave given the eminent danger of being the butt of a homosexual joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do Jews suck? Because they lie, steal money, and start wars.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the rabbi say to the priest? I respect your religion but have faith in judiasm.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what's one thing we're all tired of but they still make? Those crappy love songs.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

There's a bunch of people standing around a retard...why is no one laughing? Its his funeral

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? Using teamwork and coordination, each can place one foot on the seat of the stool, and using each other for balance and support, they can all stand on the stool. The fact that they are gay is prevalent.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

what do you do when you see a black man getting hitted by a Mexican taxi? -Call 911

thumb_up thumb_down -12

why did ya dad eat ya food?? because ya sister

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What is 9 + 10? 21

thumb_up thumb_down -12

It was a dark night, I was walking home from the shops in town, The wind was whistling through my damp hair, My spine tingled and i tucked my hands under my stinking pits. I felt like someone was watching me, I walked faster the breath was warm on my kneck i turned around. It was gary glitter he pulled down my pants and gave me the best sucky i ever had. We kissed and i tasted the cheese from my knob. In all garry glitter has a giant knob

thumb_up thumb_down -12

a dinosaur with a large clown hat is walking down the street when he is confronted by an obese monkey human with red hair. I set this up for a good pun, but the one i have is potatoes.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the little kid fall off the rollercoaster? His dad threw him off.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's black,white, and red all over? Nothing, because if it is completely covered in red then it can only be red.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

what did Harry Potter get for christmas? ... nothing his parents are dead !

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did the teacher say to the pupil who was bad at maths? You are bad at maths and will never complete any sum EVER!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Whats black and crying after 10 minute my wife's eyes when she left the kitchen

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's big, blue, and eats rocks? A big blue rock eater.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops