Violets are red. Roses are blue. I am drunk, and i'm about to spew.

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Mary had a little lamb, little lamb, little lamb Mary had a little lamb and the doctor was surprised

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Most likely to get to a source of food or escape a predator.

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How do you make a model ugly? you shoot her in the face.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven has a hook for one of his hands carries a chain saw in the other an gets into six's dreams...thats just scary

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What drink is dark yellow and freshly squeezed from one of the most healthy snacks? Piss.

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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Why did the man eat his hat? Autism.

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What happens when you shoot a priest in the heart? He dies.

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Women.

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How to do you kill a blonde? Various methods, most effective of which is firing squad

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What did Stephen Hawkins say to President Obama? He didn't his computer did.

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What's black and white and read all over? A zebra family that was just murdered by African poachers.

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I can't see my forehead

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knock knock whos there a boy a boy who ? oh, sorry he just got hit by a train.

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What happened to all of the happy birds flying over the field? They were all suddenly stricken by the bird flu and died.

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What's yellow and highly dangerous? Shark-infested banana pudding.

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Don't you hate it when your reading a sentence and it doesn't end how you testicles.

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Why was the boy crying? Because his parents were in a car crash and died and his grandparents were already dead and he got cancer for christmas. And he had no testicles

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Why did the wealthy black man shoplift from the convenience store? He is a kleptomaniac.

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21

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Knock, Knock Who's There? (Silence) Wondering who was there, the man opened the door, to find a baby in a basket in front of him.

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What do you call a dead baby lying in the road? A Tragedy

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is black

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops