if youre reading this its probably because youre on anti-joke.com

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is your refrigerator running? yeah oh, ok. just making sure your food doesn't spoil

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When adolf hitler went to the chippy, He ordered a bock wurst. Later, he ate the whole thing and said he wants another.

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knock knock... whose there? I don't know why don't you open it and find out dumb ass... Gosh people and their common sense these days!!

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Why did the child cry? It was beat up and thrown in a trashcan.

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What's that in the road.... a-head?

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How do you stop a bird from flying? Shoot it with a harpoon gun.

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Q: What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? A: His name.

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1. Whats the difference between an orange? 2. Finish your sentence asshole.

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A creationist, an evolutionist, and Neanderthal Man walk into a bar. They order two beers and a glass of red wine. The bartender asks: "Will that be all?". The evolutionist says "Yes"

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What did the rapist say to the woman? "If you tell anyone I'll kill you!"

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what did Marvin Gay's father say to him before he died? "hey come listen to this 45 real quick"

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What came first the chicken or the egg? The chicken god made two of every animal

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What do you call a fat black guy in KFC? A guy who likes KFC.

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What do you call a girl with no arms or legs on the beach? Sandy What do you call that girl tossed into the water? Sandy Duncan

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Why did the squirl eat the accorn? Because he enjoys it.

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A scientist walks into a bar. His forehead becomes swollen.

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rebecca is a hard worker

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A deaf, mute clown wearing nothing but a dead cat, a rainbow wig, and his own feces breaks into a couples home on April fools day. Then he murders them both because he is an escaped patient from an asylum for the criminally insane.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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Q: What is worse than The Apocalypse? A: Darkseid, Thanathos, Red Hulk, Onslaught, come on The Apocalypse cant even beat the X-men! Moral: "I AM THE APOCALYPSE, YOU ARE NOT FIT TO SURVIVE!"

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What did the nerd say to the bully? Nothing. The bully killed him before he could say anything.

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Q /why do people eat dinner? A/ because their hungry

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say yes will u remember me in a year?yes will u remember me in a month? yes will u remember me in a week?yes will u remember me in a minute?yes will u remember me in a second?yes knock knock whos there u said u will remember me u dick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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