so dont touch it.

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Knock knock Who's there? A penguin A penguin who? Just kidding, a penguin could never survive in this climate, I'm mark and was wondering if I could give you an estimate on some new siding

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus.

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What's the difference between a pen and a tiger? Believe it or not they are both not a cantaloupe.

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- Mom, you've got a banana in your ear. - Son I can't hear you I've got a banana in my ear!

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Yes.

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Wy did the chicken?

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Roses are Red Violets are Gay This poem makes no sense Octopus

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Women's rights

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Is this where I type the joke?

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Knock, Knock... Who's there? Your mother and I are getting a divorce.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a registered six affender.

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What happens when you shoot a bear and you kill it? It dies.

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Poem Of Love: Each time i see you i feel like i need you and i love you.. i hope you became my girl and live with me cause without you i can't live.

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Why did the man get fired? Because he had cancer

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A boy has a penis, a girl has a vagina.

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Give me thumbs up!

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What do you call a black man eating fried chicken? By his name, which could be John, considering the popularity of said name.

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Why did the man not go to church? He was an atheist.

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Why did the cat explode on the street? Cause i put a grenade in a fridge and then threw it at it.

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What did the monkey say to the owner of the world's rarest stamp? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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Why could'nt the boy eat peanuts? Because if he did he would proceed to have an allergic reaction, his throat would swell up, he would go into analeptic shock and die.

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An Antihumorous Story Part One A rich man named Richard told his son James that he could have anything in the world for his thirteenth birthday. James only asked for one thing: a silver box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. So Richard gave him a metal box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. Five years later, Richard heard a strange noise coming from James' room. It was the sound of a machine whirring, then a high pitched scream. All of a sudden, James bursted out of his room and ran out of the house. Later, the boy could not recall the incident. It was completely erased from his memory. For his eighteenth birthday, James asked for a golden box containing 785 pink ping balls. So it was granted him. For the next ten years, Richard kept a careful eye on his son. Every night, James could be heard whispering madly, "It's almost ready," over and over. For his twenty-eighth birthday, James asked for a simple wooden box that had one million pink ping pong balls inside. "What do you need all those pink ping pong balls for?" Richard finally asked. James froze, fiddling with something in the pocket of his jacket. "Oh yes, that. They were necessary for--" Then he got hit by a bus.

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Q: What is that white stuff in chicken shit? A: Thats chicken shit too

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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