Why did little Lucy climb up a tree? Cos her dad beats her.

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how do u make an infant cry? hit it in the face with a full grown salmon.

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Q. How did the blind man survive from walking of a cliff? A. He didn't he died

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What happened when the boys visited Penn State? They got toured around campus and decided that it would be their future college.

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Knock, Knock... Who's there? Your mother and I are getting a divorce.

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What did the kid with no arms, no legs, and cancer get for his birthday? A: Polio.

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what did the lawyer say to the doctor? hello.

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Why did the child get hit by a bus? He was blind.

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What's worse than your dad being hit by a car? Your family being hit by a bus.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is a woman.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

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Four rats are smoking in an alley. One rat turns to another and comments, "These are some fine smokes. Where'd ya score these?" The rat holding the pack of Menthols replies, "Off a' Fred." He points to a rotting whale carcass in the road. The other rats are horrified. "How did a whale die in the street?!," they squeak. "He didn't. He died on the beach."

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connor sucks

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One day 2 people were gonna fight after school and the final bell wrung then they started the mtch and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing that you say when you don't want to fight and ypu let the other person win?" The other guy says, "I give up?" Then the challenger says, " I WIN!!!"

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What is 8 times 4? 32

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What's black, white, and red all over? The color scheme. Except for the black and white. They're shades.

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A Chinese man, an American man, and a Mexican man are sitting in an airplane. When the flight attendant comes by with food, the Chinese and American both opt for pretzels, while the Mexican prefers crackers and makes his selection accordingly. The three sit back and enjoy their snacks separately.

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four nazis are walking towards this jew. as soon as the first nazi came in arms reach of the jew he and his friends started to maliciously hug the jew.......................................and then 20 years later they killed his family.

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A man named Joe has practiced drawing cartoon characters his entire life. When Joe turns 15 he decides to enter a local drawing competeiton. Joe works very hard drawing his cartoon and finally finishes. When it is the time to hand in his drawing his drawing, he hands it in an receives a satisfying 2nd place and continues on with his life. Two years later Joe decides to enter another drawing competeiton (this one much more competitive) after his drawing skills have tremendously increased. He begins drawing and is 3/4 of the way finished when Joe is brutally murdered by a mentally disturbed man and cannot hand in his art work and is therefore disqualified from the competeiton and loses.

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a boy walks over to the living room and shouts " happy birthday, daddy!!" the response is "i'm a cup, therefore i do not have a birthday because i am an inanimate object."

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Jesus said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But, John came fifth and won a toaster.

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Gorden Brown.

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Why don't elephants eat bananas? Because they don't have opposable thumbs.

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whats are the similarities between a dolphin and a bus? they both have wheels, aside from the dolphin. it does not,

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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