Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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A. Knock Knock B. Welcome!

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Q:why did the boy fall off the swing A:he had no arms Q:why couldn't he get up A:he had no legs Q:why did he die A:he fell in a puddle

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Diseases show if a prerson lacks vitamins and minerals.

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? 17

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fack me in the ace! CC

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What is black and white and red all over? Two Nuns in a chainsaw fight.

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What did the dog say to the cat? "Bark."

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You're Adopted.

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what's worse than getting a paper cut? Hiroshima

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Jeff goes to the store, Helen Keller.

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i cant think of one.

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Why does Eli Manning play for the Giants? Because he is huge.

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guys ive got a TANK under my house a septic tank

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You are so average that, if you entered an average contest, you'd come in middle place.

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Mindfuck: They call you a patient where medics are because they do not want you to become impatient. The Coronel is the Kernel of the army (coronel sounds a lot like coronel no?) Sergeant = Sir gent. as in Sir gentle(man) Ok, so if you experience insanity one day, does that make you insane forever? In that case I was born and will die hungry and thirsty. Sigmund Freud= Sickman fraud. General: The guy you should generally listen to if you are in the army. 3.14 ratebay = PIRATE BAY! Why is Satan the antichrist, humans killed him :P Satan only "tempted his thirsty brother with water at the desert" Jesus showed real power by saying "NO WATER WHEN I AM THIRSTY IS BAD FROM MY BROTHER!"

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How do you keep children off your front lawn? Molest them.

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what's the difference between a black man and a lift? both can raise babies, a part from the black man

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JLo made a song about my diick- "On the Floor"

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What did grandma receive for her 75th birthday? Alzheimer's.

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"jrfevkhbgjk" said the retard.

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How did the blonde burn her ear? In a terrible accident involving molten lava.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was unaware that it could get run over by a motor vehicle.

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There is a man with the surname of Westmoreland. This is a terrible name.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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