Q: Why did the rich Wallstreet business man move into Harlem? A: Because sex offenders weren't welcome anywhere else.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What did the unicorn say when he was kicked out of the grocery store? Nothing, dodo birds dont exist

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What's big, yellow, and can't swim? A school bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

What did the Catholic Priest say to the young boy? God bless you.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

What's more annoying than a mosquito? the Sandy Hook Massacre

thumb_up thumb_down -43

a customer walks into a store and says, "the customer is always wrong." the employee replies, "no, the customer is always right." "you just contradicted yourself."

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Knock, knock -Who's there? Help -Help who? Im dying of lukemia

thumb_up thumb_down -45

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple?

thumb_up thumb_down -45

What are little Timmy's hopes and dreams? Destroyed.

thumb_up thumb_down -47

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the hospital? A: The victim of a violent mob attack

thumb_up thumb_down -49

Yo mama's so fat that when she steeped on the scale, it read a rather large number as compared to the average, healthy weight of the human race. Of course, she could become thin by working out or eating less, but she chooses not to because of the laziness that has now corrupted her completely.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

What did the kid with no arms and no legs go for christmas? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -51

What did the hat say to the other hat? Nothing, because hats don't talk, stupid.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

there was a tomatoes and it blew up and died. Why did it blow up? The Nazi's needed ketchup for there Jew Burgers

thumb_up thumb_down -51

Knock knock? Who's there? To. To who? To WHOM.

thumb_up thumb_down -59

Bill: Knock, Knock. Sean: Who's there? Bill: It's your neighbor, Bill Walters, from across the street. Sean: Oh, hey Bill, how are you and Margie? Bill: Oh, I'm doing fine, but Margie just got out of the hospital for a broken arm. Sean: My gosh, what happened. Bill: She was just loading the Halloween decorations down from the attic while I wasn't home and fell. She's fine though; it was only a minor fracture. Sean: Well thank goodness she alright. Bill: Anyway, I came over to return those hedge clippers I borrowed from you last month. Sean: Oh, thank you. How did they work? Bill: Just great once I gave them a coat of oil. It was a big job... I haven't trimmed those bushes in three years. Sean: No problem, I almost never use them myself. Well I better get back to Jeanie...I'm helping her make dinner. Bill: Alright, Well thanks again.

thumb_up thumb_down -73

What did the Wife say to her husband about his Erectile Dysfunction? - Im sorry I dont know how to finish a joke based on this private a matter.

thumb_up thumb_down +74

....ZZzzzzz.....ZZzzzzz.....

thumb_up thumb_down +60

What do you call a black man in court? A lawyer.

thumb_up thumb_down +58

whats long and hard on a black man? his femur.

thumb_up thumb_down +58

A white man walking dpwn the street finds a brief-case with a timer on it. A young muslim man says he dropped it. The white man then asked "What's the timer for"? The young man said, "Nothing really, just helps keep the time." They both went their separate ways.

thumb_up thumb_down +58

Knock Knock. Whose There? Lettuce. Thats impossible.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

What's the color of a retarde dogs hair? 69

thumb_up thumb_down +46

What's the difference between a Jew and a Generator? One powers your house...and then there's the generator.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops