How do you survive a snow storm? Kill yourself

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Why is it hot outside? Because God made it so.

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How many Muslims does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get back up? She had no legs. Why couldn't she see? The sun was in her eyes.

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What did the watermelon say to the apple? Nothing. Watermelons are fruits and incapable of speech.

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a man is bussy at work, when he gets called by his doctor. YOUR WIFE IS HAVING A BABY! the doctor yells. so the man runs to his car, drives home like a madman, and arrives home with his doctor holding the newborn in his arms. "congratulations" the doctor says "it's a boy" the man takes the baby in his arms and says: "but, this child is black!" his wife cheated on him and the familly breaks appart

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A Cheerio is at Cheerio high school, and there is another Cheerio that he wants to ask to the prom, but she is a frosted Cheerio and because of Cheerio social statuses she would not go with him. So he goes to the Cheerio factory so he can become a frosted Cheerio. The factory workers tell him that he can be a frosted Cheerio, but the machines are malfunctioning today and they can only frost half of him. He agrees, and the girl Cheerio goes to the prom with him. He shows up at the prom with her, and she asks him to get her some punch. So, he's walking around, looking for the punch line, when he realizes: There isn't any.

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how many babies does it take to paint a house? that is child labor, which is illegal in many countries.

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What do you call a bunch of black guys on mars? a problem What do you call 1 million black guys on mars? a bigger problem What do you call all the black guys on mars? a solution

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Is every Voltorb a terrorist?

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why did Sally fall off of the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there?

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What do you call a girl who got raped by ger dad? Casey Anthont

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knock knock who's there? It's Jim we haven't seen each other since college Why hello there come on in

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A blonde and a brunette are stuck on a desert island, they later died of starvation.

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A gay kid and a group of his friends are at the park. Gay: hey can you do a cartwheel? Girl: helllll no! Gay: Are you straight? Girl: Yah? Gay: Im gay and i can do one.

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Question: What is black and white and read all over? Guess: A newspaper? Answer: No. A zebra that was shot by a poacher. Poaching is a serious problem all over the world and should be looked down upon by all. It is not something to joke about.

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varför skriver jag på svenska jag vet inte

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A duck quacks in a mountain range. No one on or nearby the mountains hears the duck because ducks' quacks don't echo.

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What is the difference between your mom and a cow? One is a 1,500 pound beast, and one is a human being.

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There women are stuck on an island, a blonde, a brunette and a ranga. They are saved days later.

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A man walks into a bar, he has a terrible drinking problem and he is ruining his family.

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George Michael walks into a bathrom.....

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So a Quadriplegic walks into a bar.....

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A black man and a white woman walk out of a mall restroom holding hands and sweating. The white woman is arrested on the spot for statutory rape and sent to prison for 10 years. The black man was barely 16 years old.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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