Why did the kid get out of school at twelve? He left early with a stomach ache

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Pokemon go: Team mystic

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What's worse than a spider bite? Two spider bites. What's worse than two spider bites? The fact that 1/3 of people get cancer. What's worse than that? Three spider bites.

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Melbourne Football Club.

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Whats the worst part of Chemotharapy? The Cancer.

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Roses are red violets are blue I would test our new water bed so be carefull with your helled shoe!

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What's yellow and smells like piss? Urine.

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What did the fat guy say to the skinny guy? You're skinny

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Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house KNOCK KNOCK who's there? da chicken

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How did they wake up Lady Gaga? They p-p-poked her face p-p-poked her face......!

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Q: What's green, fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? A: A pool table

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Guess what.. chicken butt

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Your momma's so fat, her doctor seriously recommends that she lose weight for the sake of her health and happiness.

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What's worse than having the name Riley Bathurst? being shot in the head by a black guy.

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im gonna sue mcdonalds i asked for a hamburger and it was a beef burger -_-

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff? 2 Survived.

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Why did the book disappear?

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Whats black and white, and red all over? A: Your grandma, naturally black haired, beaten to a pulp and left pale white with blood covering the majority of her body.

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Q: What's black and white, and red all over ? A: A penguin in a blender.

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Why can't the cheetah run fast anymore? Because it died in a forest fire.

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A Jewish, Italian, and Russian man are stranded on an island. Eventually the Russian man dies from heatstroke, leaving the other two to decide whether or not to feast on his remains. The Italian eventually goes mad and tries to murder the Jewish man who is forced to defend himself and kill his remaining friend. Shortly after, the Jewish man is eventually rescued by a passing German vessel after suffering severe dehydration and malnourishment and hanging on only by his faith in God. As they are leading him to safety, the Jewish man eventually summons the strength to tell his saviors about the horrible things he has done and all he has gone through, not knowing if he'll ever be able to forgive himself. His German rescuers take one awkward look at him, and don't know what to say to help him, leading afterwards to several years of PTSD therapy and rehabilitation.

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How do you describe a funny man on stilts? Stand up comedy

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Why does little susie enjoy her life? Because it was her birthday 364 days ago.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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