How do you kill a blond? Stab her repeatedly 10 consecutive times in the head with a knife.

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What's big, yellow, and can't swim? A school bus.

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A: Knock Knock B: ...

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why was the old woman angry? fig pudding.

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Why do the cangaroos are weird? cause they have testicles in front and penis back, is real!

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A mushroom walked into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve your kind here." The mushroom said, "What? I'm a fungi." The bartender said, "Exactly. It's a health hazard. I already have two strikes and if I lose the bar my wife will divorce me."

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Saying "MY MOM" everyone time ur asked a question

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Your mother is so stupid that she has trouble discerning certain facts from fiction.

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No, luke. I am your father. damnit

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Why did the man laugh when he saw someone using a shake weight? He remembered Dane Cook's stand up preformance from the night before.

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Please Rape William Wright

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What a person such as you would say. Anyway, did you notice how I started by emulating your way of typing, spelling, spacing and so on?

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How does one peel a potato? First I would suggest going to your local grocery store, and purchasing a vegetable peeler (although, in fact, the potato is not considered a vegetable). Once at home, I recommend disinfecting it of germs. Unless you already own a vegetable peeler, in which case I would simply peel the potato as every normal human would.

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What do you call a black man in court? A lawyer.

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Womens Rights.

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"Do you wanna hear a funny joke?" Yeah, Sure! "A funny joke."

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Why didn't the boy have any toes? - Because he did not have any legs.

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What's the difference between a duck?

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Jesus Christ walks into a bar and the bartender says "Holy crap it's Jesus!" and everyone quickly updates their Facebooks.

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This is a joke

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Q: how much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A: 14

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Why was the black man hand cuffed by a woman cop? Because they are a married couple who feel like role play will help spark their sex life again.

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what do you call a black man who is flying a plane? A: a piolt

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How do Helen keller's parents punish her? They sternly reprimand her for her misdeeds.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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