"Do you wanna hear a funny joke?" Yeah, Sure! "A funny joke."

Never bring a knife to a sword fight Bring A GIANT FREAKING HIPPOPOTAMUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Q: how much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A: 14

When life hands you lemons, you should question your sanity

whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? A: a pizza is a food that was created in italy and is regularly eaten daily around the world and a jew is a religion that is constantly criticized and made fun of because they are different.

What do you call an Arab flying a plane? A pilot.

Cat got your tongue? Punch it in the face, and retrieve your tongue.

What is quite heavy and if it falls off a tree and hits you in your head you die? A sheets packet

What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

Why did the chicken cross the road? why? Womens rights

Lethal injection is a lot more humane than the electric chair. I know because nobody's complained about it yet.

Try saying "Good Eye Might" without sounding Australian.

A girl was walking home from school, she had a pizza box in her hands, her mom was waiting for her in the car to take her to T.G.I.F, and then she dropped the pizza box in the middle of the street. In a frantic attemp to get the box, she run out into the middle of the street and got hit by a semi. Her funeral is tomorrow.

i am an inbred jew who likes penis up my bum ~Nathan Barras

Old guitars sound like cat's guts

FUCK YOU NEVEN

Why did Jake have a bad spring break? Because he got hit by a car and died

why did little johnny scream. he was getting torn to pieces

How do two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for 30 minutes? They don't and they died.

Q. What did the blak guy say to the other black guy? A. Hey.

What did one prisoner on death row say to the other? Can you please clean off the seat when you're done? I'd like to die in my own urine.

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

Why did someone see a penguin walking in the desert? They were dreaming, because Penguins waddle and live in the Arctic.

i got angry and i was like " i really want to kick someone" ,my friend was on the ground and shes like "you can kick me" ,and i'm like "REALLY" ,then i kicked her really hard and she cried...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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