I'm rubber and you're glue, whatever you say bounces of me and bounces of you too because sound isn't affected by your adhesive properties.

Who graduated top of their class, got their degree two years early and lead a very successful life? Not you

What did the man say to his doctor? AHHH AHHHHH OH MY GOD! AHHH OUCH HOLY SHIT FUUUUUUCK!!!... ____/\_____/\_____/\___________________

Busted? What the hell is going on?

Why did the chicken cross the road? Unfortunately there are billions of chickens in the world and based on the question it is not possible to determine which specific chicken is being referred to. Even if we were able to ascertain this knowledge it would be unlikely that we could determine its purpose, as chickens don't usually make decisions based on logical thought.

As an airplane is about to crash, a female passenger jumps up frantically and announces, "If I'm going to die, I want to die feeling like a woman." She removes all her clothing and asks, "Is there someone on this plane who is man enough to make me feel like a woman?" A man stands up, removes his shirt and says, "Here, iron this!".

What's more funny than a dead baby? A dead baby dressed like a clown.

What did the midget get for Christmas? A new watch and a gift card for Applebee's.

dead battery come on down

Why couldn't the Black man become a surgeon? He was Blind.

What's blue and pillowy? A blue pillow

What's worse than being held hostage? Waking up and finding dick your mouth

I swear to god it wasn't me! Dont swear to god its a sin !

Q: What did the Mexican kid get for Christmas? A: My bike.

Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact? Some men are blind.

I tried to call my friend in Haiti. It went straight to vibrate.....

Knock Knock! Who's there? Banana. Go away.

What's big and fat? An obese man.

A daring man proclaimed "Well, here goes nothing!" as his FaceBook status, and all his friends were annoyed.

who's sexually attracted to bones? James Cornish

Bin Laden: dang, these pizza guys are so late, this pizza better be free! door: Ring ring ring.. Bin Laden: yes its finally here!

How do you keep a black man from robbing your house? Lock your doors, or perhaps get a update-to-date security system.

How do you stop someone from simply copying an already posted anti-joke? No, seriously, how do you?

Jersey Shore

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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