I like my women like I like my coffee. Without a penis

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Knock knock Who's there? Hurry up, let me in! Hurry up, let me in, who? *gunshot*

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Have you heard about the Polish hockey team? They're not very good, but what they lack in skills they make up for in enthusiasm and good team spirit.

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What's the difference between Cindy Crawford and a Snickers bar? Nothing. One is a mediocre actress, the other is a peanut based bar of chocolate confectionary.

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what do you watch ? a tv

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Sure, if my waifu aproves, hell, the more the hornier. CONDOMS? ARE YOU INSANE? CONDOMS ARE FOR PUSSIES... ..:WHIIIIIICH sorta makes sense so okay, my for a moment I thought you where not gonna go trough with this... Nah just kidding, I already got you, now if you want to break free I am gonna be like "MEH!" So, uh, you shaven or not? Please dont be "trimmed", sometimes it just looks like a pussy with a mustachio, thats bullshit.

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What do you call a black guy who sells drugs? a pharmacist

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Why was the mexican being lazy? Because he lead a very successful life and retired early and now can enjoy the luxury of the finer things in life.

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What did the firefighter say to his crew when they put out the fire? -Let's go home

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A priest a rabbi and an iman are stuck in the desert. After walking for days without rescue or civilisation in sight, and rapidly running out of food and water, they decide to each pray to their respective gods for rescue, and in doing so solve the ultimate question of which religion is the true religion. They all die.

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Why is Billy in a ditch? He stepped on a landmine and was promptly burst into many pieces. The ditch was coincidental.

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how do make you a child cry? break his fingers

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What's worse that finding a worm in your apple? Half the holocaust

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Q: What did the nomad get for christmas? A: Most likely nothing because he lives in the middle of nowhere where no stores exist. If anything, he got a sandstorm.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she has no arms.

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the best time to wear a striped sweater is all the time

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How do you get a clown of a swing? Hit it with an ax.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Eat a dick you sh!t fukk! I'm going have to ask you leave now,

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Knock knock Who's there This is the police, open the door. I don't know anybody by that name

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What was the pirates grade? Arrr That isn't a valid grade

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf a bread

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Why did I write this anti-joke? Because I am generally not that funny.

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what do all black jokes start with (look left look right)

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What’s black and white and red all over? A zebra in a meat grinder

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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