So this farmer had theses two amazingly fast horses, one named slokey and the other pokey. They would run in the pasture and bring many people to watch. So one day this man says hey, you should enter them in the county derby. So he does and the whole race its slokey, pokey slokey, pokey, and slokey wins by a nose. So after the farmer collects his prize money a man walks up and says, hey those horses are pretty fast, you should enter them in the state derby. So he loads his horses up to the capital and prepares them. When the gates open slokey and pokey dash out of the gate. The whole race its slokey, pokey, slokey, pokey, and slokey wins by a nose. After all the press conferences a man says, hey you should enter those horses in the kentucky derby. So the farmer enters them and drives down to kentucky. The gates open and the whole time its slokey, pokey, slokey, pokey, and slokey wins by a nose. After the press meetings a man says hey you should enter your horses in the european derby. The farmer says no, im going to retire my horses. One fall afternoon pokey says to slokey, man, i wish i could have won a single race. So they race around the huge pasture and the whole way its slokey, pokey, slokey pokey, and pokey wins by a nose! All the farm animals go crazy and the farm dog says "congratulations pokey you finally won!" And pokey says "HOLY SHIT A TALKING DOG!"

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Why did the black man have to stand in the bus? All of the other seats were taken.

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That's why her hair is so big, she teases it and uses a lot of expensive products.

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Why did Hitler kill the Jews? He didn't, the people he told to kill them did.

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What gets wetter as it dries? Sarah Jessica Parker

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Why did the woman not make her husband a sandwich? Because he died in 9/11

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What do you call a black guy that drives a plane? A pilot

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Why did the beaver cross the road? To meet Justin Bieber!

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How did the mecanic die? He drowned

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What's worse than a murderer? Two murderers.

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what happened to Timmy when he fell off his bike? CANCER.

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What is red and tastes like parsley? Red Parsley

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How many black people does it take to screw in a lightbulb?. I dont know either it was dark.

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A blonde went to a doctor for a checkup. The blonde couldn't hear the doctor 'cuz she had headphones on so the doctor took them off. A couple of minutes later she died. The doctor was curious so he put the headphones on. It was saying, "Breathe in, breathe out. Breathe in, breathe out..."

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wots brown and smells like shite shite

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As friend of mine recently told me that he knew my deepest darkest secret. When I asked him what it was, he said that I was too emotionally unstable, and that I would never be ready to settle down. I killed him.

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What is worse the the Holocaust? Nothing

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Why did Jimmy's sexy teacher ask him to stay behind after class? His grades have been slipping and she expects better from her students. How anyone views her sexually is of no relevance to this situation.

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what is the hardest part of eating a vegetable? the wheelchair

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Q: How do you solve a problem like Maria. A: You kill her. You kill Maria.

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Three men walk into a bar. Start drinking, fight each other and sustain massive head injuries.

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whats black? a black man

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the dog that was chasing it.

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Hello Braydon

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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