Do you really want to know what i shit? Poo

Why was the fat man removed from the restaurant? When his date didn't show up he started and crying and proceeded to stab himself with a fork

What did the boy with no hands get for Christmas? Gloves.

Why did the black kid fail his math test? Because he had down syndrome

what's worse than a dead baby in the bathtub? if the baby was named Grace.

What's black, white, and red all over? The color scheme. Except for the black and white. They're shades.

Four rats are smoking in an alley. One rat turns to another and comments, "These are some fine smokes. Where'd ya score these?" The rat holding the pack of Menthols replies, "Off a' Fred." He points to a rotting whale carcass in the road. The other rats are horrified. "How did a whale die in the street?!," they squeak. "He didn't. He died on the beach."

how do u make an infant cry? hit it in the face with a full grown salmon.

There was a man on a park bench and he saw a duck fly by so he decided to go and see what it was up to. He saw that it was just going for a swim in a near by pond. He died 2 years ago of auto erotic asphyxiation because of a common fetish.

Q.whats the differecne between a bicycle? A. orange,...a vest dont got no sleeves.

What do you call girls that can run faster than me? Virgins

What was the Latino man doing on my laptop? He was my friend and he had asked me first. He was also ordering a computer on amazon for himself.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

Q: What did one dog say to the other dog? A: "Bitch!"

luke moore cant pull it back

What did the man with cancer do? Die

What's worse than your dad being hit by a car? Your family being hit by a bus.

im not as random as you think I- Potato

Why did the chicken cross the road? Nobody knows, he was hit by a car.

My mom gave me a quarter. I tryed to spend it on bubblegum but 7-11 said no...

Knock knock. Who's there? Not Heath Ledger.

Knock knock, Come in...

i cannot get my penis to rise to the occasion, it is the holocaust tho..

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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