Have you heard the deaf guitarist? He's really good.

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Why was the little boy crying? Because a stranger shoved explosives up his butthole.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He then proceeds to order a couple drinks, and shortly leaves after drinking them, later ending up in a fatal car accident.

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Knock Knock Whos there? It's me your mom you dumbass and let me in

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Wow, so today is 9/11? Yes.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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What would be worse than the Holocaust? 2 Holocausts.

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A man comes to a fork in the road. He then looks around then proceeds to pick it up, puts it in his pocket, then continues walking down the road as if nothing had happened.

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Why did the penguin die? due to an increase in the quantity of greenhouse gases that are being released into the atmosphere, global warming is on the rise. So the penguin died because his home melted.

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Why didn't Jeffrey become a butler? He did become a butler.

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What is the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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A fish and a human had a conversation. The conversation was not interesting because fish can't speak and the human felt awkward.

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Why doesn't the South Pole war veteran remember the name of his child? He is a penguin and could care less about naming his children. Why doesn't the penguin on the North Pole remember the name of his child? There are no penguins on the North Pole.

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There women are stuck on an island, a blonde, a brunette and a ranga. They are saved days later.

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Yo mama is so fat, she eats three times the normal amount of calories one should eat in a single day. This resulted in her early demise, to which you mourned for numerous months before accepting the fact that she was gone.

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Whats worse than a dead baby in a puddle of blood? A dead baby in soup.

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Why is 6 afriad of 7? because 7 killed 8 with a pistol and is now on a killing spree.

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Whats brown and smells like poo?? Poo

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what the difference between matthew and a retard? The retard can do math

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What's the difference between God and Kanye West? God doesn't think he's Kanye West.

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing!!

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Matt is not funny.

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What did Michael Jackson get for Christmas? Nothing he's dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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