What's the difference between watermelon and baby? I don't eat watermelon.

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Why does Michael J. Fox make the best milkshakes? Because he uses only the finest ingedients.

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knock, knock who's there? I'm here to kill u! I'm here to kill u who? .......

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it died! Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey!!

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So a bunch of blondes are in a group and a murder comes by and sais, "if you want to live, answer a question right." so the blondes pick there smartest on. the first question is, what is 9+4... the blonde answers five, the crowd goes "give her another chance giver her another chance, same thing happens, she gets it wrong and the crowd goes "give her another chance, give her another chance." the murderer sais "ok fine this is your final guess, what is 2+2" the blonde goes "uuhhhhhh... 4?" And the whole crowd goes "give her another chance give her another chance

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when i start seeing A TON of black people what does that mean? im color blind

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the jokes are repetitive on this site

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So a Jew an Asian and a gay guy all walk into a bar... ...I lied. It was an oven.

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roses are red violets are blue some poems rhyme but this one doesn't

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yo mamma's so stupid, she is not that smart.

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Johnny got hit by a bomb. Where is he now? Everywhere. Knock knock. (Who's there?) Not Johnny

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What do you call a group of angry unemployed black guys? The NBA

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A.how does a penguin change a light bulb? A.the same way all other penguins change a lightbulb

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No? Neither has Stevie Wonder

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Knock knock Who's there? Carrot Carrot who? Carrot in the tree house, cause it's orange.

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Why was the chicken sad because it lost it's family

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What's the difference between Bobby and a plane? Bobby can be sexually molested.

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Knock knock Who's there Your son and his vagina.

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What did the japanese man say to the other Japanese man? I like your eyes.

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What clicks when its out of lead ? A gun Why was the little black boy crying ? He ran out of that grape drank How do you make a dead baby float ? You take your foot of its head How do you know when your life is over ? When you start watching Twilight What is blue and sticky ? Blue Stick What do you get when you mix a dog and a cat ? Shit

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What is hotter than two girls making out? The Sun.

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Why did the fat lady poop on my knee? Because i'm thirsty.

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How did the guy feel after his wife died? Pretty shitty, I'd imagine..

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What is big, white and hairy A refrigerator, I lied about the hair

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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