2 tomatoes walk across a road tomato 1 gets hit by a car tomato 2 gets confused, because tomatoes don't have legs and therefore cannot "walk across a road" And furthermore, a tomato does not have a brain, and thus cannot get confused.

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A walrus walks into a bar

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Yo mommas so fat... that when it was rainning, she put on her rain coat and went outside, everyone was saying that the sun came up

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Less than you cuz your fat.

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Q) 1+1=? A) 6.

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baskets

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What do u call it when a Jamaican gets angrey? Nothing, at all. Just an angrey person

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A Black Man walks into a bar...

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What did the child rapist say to the little boy? I'm going to rape you.

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Does your face hurt? Because if it does, you might want to see a doctor.

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What did the black guy do to the hooker, he took her dead body out of his trunk

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What do you get when you cross sodium citrate, citric acid, benzyl alcohol, monoethanolamine, sodium benzoate, gylcol disterate, FD&C Yellow #5, ammonium lauryl sulfate, methylisothiazolinone, fragrances/perfumes, FD&C Blue #1, sodium chloride, zinc pyrithione, methylchloroisothiazolinone, ammonium xylenesulfonate, ammonium laureth sulfate, cetyl alcohol, cocamide, guar hydropropyltrimonium chloride, 1-Decene, homopolymer, hydrogenated, trimethylolpropane tricaprylate and water? Head & Shoulders Dandruff Shampoo for Fine-Oily Hair

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Roses are red I have a phone,no texts me am forever alone~The Jokers

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what did the left nut say to the right nut? The guy above us is a real dick huh?

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Whats 2+2=? ?= CHICKEN

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James: They say attitudes are contagious. Bill: How do you know? James: My whole family caught it and they will all die within 2 weeks.

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roses are blue violets, are orange, i am color blind

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How do you know if there's an elephant in your fridge? The fridge is broken and the elephant has mauled your dog

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How do you stop an alcoholic from drinking ? You leave him in the desert for 4 days, eventually he'll die from dehydration .

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what did the scene kid get for christmas? a gift card which he used ironically.

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what did the lawyer say to the doctor? hello.

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A bear and a rabbit sits by a small lake in the forest, taking a shit. After a while, the bear asks the rabbit: "Do you have problems with shit hanging from you fur after you're done?" The Rabbitm ponders, and responds: "No, bear. I really don't". Than the bear wiped his ass with some moss.

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A giant watermelon falls on a man He's dead

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What would you rather do or drag a board?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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