why wouldn't the boy shake his teachers hand? his abusive father cut it off with an axe when he was a child

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? Watching your house burn down and your family scream in pain as their flesh burns and you suffer from chronic depression.

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A man walks into a bar. He buys a beer, drinks it and walks out.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? As much as he wants to.

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Why did the cancer patient shave his head? He wanted to pretend he still had hair.

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roses are red , violets are blue , sugar is sweet and so are you. the roses are wilting the violets are dead. the sugar bowl is empty and so is your head

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Know what's worse than three bee stings? living every day in fear of your schizophrenic hallucinations

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What's the difference between a fine wine and a dead baby in a blender? One gets better as it ages, and the other is a horrific accident.

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WHATS FASTER THAN INTERNET BUSTA RYMES

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whatts blue and fuzzy? Blue fuzz

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What do u call it when a Jamaican gets angrey? Nothing, at all. Just an angrey person

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What did Chuck Norris say when he saw a cop -Hi

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Penis

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A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

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Whats the difference between a Mexican and a bucket of poop. The Mexican is a human the bucket of poop is an object filled bodily wastes.

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Why did the clown fall off the swing? He got shot.

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Whats the difference between football and basketball? Absolutely everything By darragh Hamilton

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Why wasn't the man able to see his son? He got run over by a train. Knock knock Who's there? The man. He was kidding about being run over.

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How can you tell if someones gay? You ask them.

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Samantha

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What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Sex.

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What do you call a black doctor? A doctor you racist

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your moms tits are so big she may have breast cancer she may have breast cancer which takes approximitely 300,000 lives per year

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What do you call a man who eats a swordfish at 11 o'clock? Dead by midnight.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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