What's worse than a tornado that kills your whole whole family? Nothing.

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Whats green and looks like eggs? Green eggs.

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What is purple and crawls? A wounded grape.

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A Jew walks into a bar. He quickly works on treating the injuries he had received from hitting his head against the bar when he had walked into it.

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Whats worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm? Biting into your dog and finding a worm.

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What happened to the guy who got bullied? He commited suicide.

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Did you hear about the cow that could fly? Me either

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What did the milk say to the oatmeal? I came from a cow nipple.

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What did the two eggs in the frying pan say to each other? Nothing, their eggs.

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Have you heard about the Polish hockey team? They're not very good, but what they lack in skills they make up for in enthusiasm and good team spirit.

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What's the difference between a Lamborghini and 10 dead babies? I don't keep a Lamborghini I'm my garage

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What is less sanitary than eating food off of the ground? Anal sex.

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Why didn't the baby cry? It was stillborn.

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There are four worms walking in a straight line. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The fourth worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied!

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Q. Why was the blonde fired from the M+M factory? A.She was addicted to meth.

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Why was the white man rich and the black man poor? Because when the white man was 11 and he didn't have a job because 11 year olds don't get hired, because its not legal, he use to pick up pennies. And when the black man was 11 he got a job mowing lawns and ended up being a lawyer graduate and spent the rest of his life paying off his school loan. The white man lived in the 70's and the black man lived in he twentieth century.

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A man was driving five penguins across the Croatian-Serbian border. He was a penguin smuggler.

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What do you call a pair of banana peels? Trash.

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Noobz -wondering why your valid anti-joke is getting voted down? Simply because it's a repeat, someone else has already submitted it. Only the original is valid for positive to votes. The regulars on here willallvote a repeat down immediately. I have 3 accounts set upwith different IP's just to do that. You have been warned. Search first mo fo's

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Why is cheese yellow? Answer: I don't know, I was hoping that you would know.

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What's green and has wheels? Boogers on a skateboard.

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Why was the white man poor? Because he could not hold a stable job for his wife and kids.

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What's the difference between a black man and and a bag of crap? A lot, but mostly the bag

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A man walks into a bar. He backs up, unwraps it, and enjoys its chocolatey deliciousness.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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