what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas?

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I've got a dig bick

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Three men are travelling in a hot-air balloon, but it starts to go down over an uninhabitable desert. One of the men must sacrifice himself to save the other two by jumping overboard to reduce the weight in the balloon. Nobody is brave enough to volunteer, and they all die painful deaths.

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Wh did Steve Jobs invent the iPhone? Because he was smart.

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why does it suck to be a black jew you get the back of the oven

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What starts with "F" and ends with "uck"? F*ck

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Yo momma's so fat she is now a sponsor for Jenny Craig after joining the program and loosing almost a 100 pounds. So I suppose she isn't too fat anymore.

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What did the doctor say to the female car crash victim? Nothing she was dead when he walked in the room.

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Why did the chicken cross the border? Because he was an immigrant and was afraid of the police.

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A Guy walks into a Bar, has a good time and leaves

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What do you call a black man with a job? An employee

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I wouldn't touch ellen degeneres with a 10 foot lance. However, i would shake her hand with my hand. Lesson: 10 foot lances are no way to touch ppl.

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what does a black guy and a chinease guy have is common? I don't know but it would be interesting to find out.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? It was hit by an oncoming motorist in a busy intersection.

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What is red and tastes like parsley? Red Parsley

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? I'm a talking banana; what more do you want from me?

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whats the difference between jimmy saville and a horse? jimmy has a bigger cock

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Why did the gum cross the road? It was stuck to the chickens foot.

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If i could rearrange the alphabet I wouldn't put U and I together. I'd put my dick in your mouth.

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what did the chicken cross the road? because its a chicken

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Why did Jimmy's sexy teacher ask him to stay behind after class? His grades have been slipping and she expects better from her students. How anyone views her sexually is of no relevance to this situation.

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whats red and and smells like blue paint red paint

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Roses are red violets are blue i got two fingers just for you/by kw

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say yes will u remember me in a year?yes will u remember me in a month? yes will u remember me in a week?yes will u remember me in a minute?yes will u remember me in a second?yes knock knock whos there u said u will remember me u dick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops