How do you scare a bonde? tell her you want to be her uterus?

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What sounds really bad? An accordion.

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A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog. Instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

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Why does Santa wear sleigh bells? Because he's got leprosy.

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what happens when a girl poops? she wipes her butt.

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AJ enjoyed his trip to Pen Island

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a girl and a guy rented a hotel room for a night. theyre siblings and stayed up all night watching very classy movies about farm animals and each of them ordered a chocolate cake to eat while watching their fantastic informational film.

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A black man, a white man, and a Mexican walk into a bar. The bartender kicks them out because he doesn't have time for another crappy joke; as the bar is very crowded that night.

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Hey i heard you where cool wait that was opposite day ;)

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women's rights

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What's worse than finding out you have aids? Nothing. Actually I lied. It would suck being an illegal immigrant.

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What did the hammer say to the drill? Nothing, they don't talk stupid.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the dog that was chasing it.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman crashed onto a desert island... The Englishman swiftly used his satellite phone to broadcast their location and they were taken home to their worried families.

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What did the prostitute say to the nun? It's nice to see you again, Sister.

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Justin Bieber is having sex with a girl. He then awakes from this horrible nightmare.

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What has two leg, but cant walk? A paraplegic.

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Why do they give old people Viagra at nursing homes? Because erectile function decreases with increasing age, and it would be unfair to needlessly deny senior citizens the right to consensual intercourse if that is what they want.

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Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

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Dear emma brown i would appreciate if i could have my dick back, the you squeezed of wwith you ass cheeck -jackson edwards

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Bake until golden at 375

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Q. how did the blond get a college degree in medicine? A. she studied hard and aced her final exam.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple?

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Q:What did the man say when he walked into a bar. A: Ouch

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops