Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, your wife and kids die.

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Q: What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? A: I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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What happened to the guy who got bullied? He commited suicide.

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i cant think of one.

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A priest walks past a mailbox with the number 666 on it. Nothing happens, because it is an ordinary mailbox.

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What do you get if you cross a bulldog with a schitzu? A half breed prone to allergies and breathing problems.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Daises are red, holy crap my garden is on fire.

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Why do firemen wear red suspenders? If they didn't, their turnout gear would not effectively protect them from flames.

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Tic tac toe. You were adopted.

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I was walking through the woods the other day when I heard a rustle in the bushes... So I went over and said, "Russell, What are you doing in the bushes?"

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Why didnt the chicken cross the road? -Its a chicken you dumb shit.

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Why did the rabbit cross the road? I don't know, I was asking you.

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What is green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree it can hurt you? A pool table.

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How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

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Whats worse then losing your phone? The Holocaust

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knock knock who's there interupting black woman interu- MMMMHHHHHMMMM

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What’s black and white and red all over? A zebra in a meat grinder

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-What do you call the brown spots in your yard? Dog shit.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? he wanted to.

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Yo momma so fat, people snicker as they walk past her, quietly laughing at a women obviously struggling with obesity. They then proceed to stop laughing, as they realize that their mother died from diabetes. They then proceed to move on with their day.

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Kid- "Where do babies come from?" Mom- *Commits Suicide*

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knock knock zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz knock knock zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz knock kock ding dong ding di-ding dong zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz sigh weeeeeeeeeewooooooooooooooooo zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz hey yo wake up zzz-oh-huh-what-whos there i've been yelling for like five minutes oh sorry jim will you let me in already all right

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The bold and unpredictable female bird escaped under the horror of the fearful fence of which enclosed the innocent chickens. As she wandered towards the nearby city of magic and dreams she approached by a large, empty road. A mysterious, shining object in the distant caught her eye. As she slowly to a shivering step towards the intereging sparkle, she was ran over by a car. EPIC FAIL LOL!!!!

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What is the difference between a blonde and a Mexican? Their hair color.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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