why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms why did no one pick her up? she was an orphan why did she drown? puddle...

why did the white man jump out of the car? because the car was crashing

What's black, white, green, red, blue, orange, gray, purple, and yellow? My art project.

Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact? Some men are blind.

When life throws you lemons what should you do? Take cover.

What's red and eats tulips? Your face!

What happened to the man who jumped into a puddle? He contracted hypothermia due to the low temperatures of the water. He died the next day.

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck would? Probably a lot of wood.

A man walks into a bar and walks up to the counter. The bartender looks the man up and down and asks "Can I help you?" "Ya, get this guy off my ass" the duck promptly replies.

Q: How can you fit 1000 jews in one car? A: The Ashtray

Why did the chicken cross the road? Idk

What's the difference between a dead cat and a dead woman? It is much more unlikely that you would have sex with a dead cat.

who hooks up with grade 7's? •Jake Muchnik

A squirrel and an owl are sitting in a tree. A farmers walks by underneath, and the squirrel turns to the owl and says nothing, because squirrels can't talk and neither can owls. Then the owl eats the squirrel because it is a bird of prey.

Three bars walk into a Jew.

1 + 1 = 3

why was the girl sleeping on the ground? because she was dead

Why did the pig walk into the bar Because he was thirsty

Why did the chicken cross the road? It had the utmost desire to.

Chuck Norris doesn't swim... He never learned

Patrick- hey spongebob i thought of something even funnier then 24 Spongebob- What patrick- 25

A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. The mexican, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. Alex, however never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation. John was never the same.

i like tits

your momma's so fat i almost didn't have sex with her.... almost.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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