What can you never have for dinner? Breakfast and lunch

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What is cold? Winter

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How did the guy feel after his wife died? Pretty shitty, I'd imagine..

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What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics? Not being retarded.

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It's weird how two of the SAME jokes can get different ratings.

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Pull over dat ass to fat, no seriously your blocking a firelane

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

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why did the white man jump out of the car? because the car was crashing

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What would you call the fatty cranial mass surrounding a malignant tumor? Ted Kennedy's Head.

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How do you make your children nice? You dont have any.

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how did helen keller break her arm? reading at 100 miles per hour

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What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

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Knock Knock Who's there? DC Soames. I'm arresting you for the suspected abduction and rape of Holly Harman.

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Q) Whats wet fishy and gets caught by fishermen? A) fish.

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Why did the teenager cross the road? To get an abortion.

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the comment about daniel was fron brock

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A: How much do you love me? B: Count the stars in the sky and you'll know. A: But, it's morning. B: Exactly.

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The original joke: "WATCH OUT FOR THAT HOLE!" "WHAT HOLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" The anti joke, aka realistic edition: "WATCH OUT FOR THAT HOLE!" "WHAT YAAAAAAAAAAAARGHHHHHHHHH!" The ballon edition: Original: "Balloon! Watch out for that Cactus!" "What Cactussssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss..." (leaking air you slowmo) The anti-joke aka realistic version: "Balloon watch out for that pointy soda!" "What soda *pop*" Moral: None of these where the least realistic!

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Follow the Yellow brick road, follow the yellow brick road........except it's not yellow.

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What's faster than a black man with a TV? Light.

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What should you do when your refrigerator is running? Tell it to FREEZE!

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A man walked into a bar There were some other people there too

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When life throws you lemons what should you do? Take cover.

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A black man walks up to the cashier with twenty buckets of KFC and seventeen gallons of grape Kool - Aid. The cashier says, "Do you want a bag for those?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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