How do you kill a 6'5 black man in a dark alley? Stab him 3 times in the appendix with a 12 inch blade.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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Q: I have 2 dogs. Why? A: I like dogs

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What would Guy and Hemech's reactions be if they saw this joke up? They would see it from the newest jokes

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What do you do when you fall of the horse? Consider calling the paramedics because it's possible that when you hit the ground your brain sustained damage and you should be rushed to a hospital immediately.

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Noobz -wondering why your valid anti-joke is getting voted down? Simply because it's a repeat, someone else has already submitted it. Only the original is valid for positive to votes. The regulars on here willallvote a repeat down immediately. I have 3 accounts set upwith different IP's just to do that. You have been warned. Search first mo fo's

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If your South American in the kitchen, what are you in the bathroom? European ( your a pee an)

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what do you get when you have unprotected sex with a hooker? an orgasm

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two guys walk into a bar. the third guy ducks

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How many Weasleys does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 2

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Why was the white man poor? Because he could not hold a stable job for his wife and kids.

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Niki Minaj's ass

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What's the difference between a Lamborghini and 10 dead babies? I don't keep a Lamborghini I'm my garage

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What did the farmer say to the woodchucks chucking his wood? Excuse me, not to be rude but i worked very hard splitting and stacking that wood and would appreciate it if you would stop throwing it in the water.

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea. That would depend on what time you are reading this. As i have no control over this, I am unable to inform you of China's current time. Perhaps you should look into a watch, world clock, or some other device capable of telling the time. That is not the Purpose of this website. However, there are numerous other places for this. God luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can, and only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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What has wings, is bald, and can't fly? A bald eagle. I lied about the part where it can't fly.

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roses are cows violets are oranges im mental are you too

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Why did the 5 year-old go to the hospital? He had cancer

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Whats the difference between a pontiac and a pile of dead babies? I dont have a pontiac in my garage.

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Q: Whats the difference between a Chicken and Your Mom? A: I dont eat the chicken

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why did the girl eat a banana? because she was hungry

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Billy Corgan: The world is a vampire! Me: No it's not. The world is a mass of mineral compounds that floats in space approximately 93,020,000 miles from the sun. It is not, in fact, a vampire.

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What did the white man say to the black man? Nothing. Earlier that day his vocal chords were ripped out by an angry chimpanzee. He will never speak again

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A blind man walks into a bar... And a table. And a chair.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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